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LAID TO REST
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Reviewed by: Ryan Doom

Directed by: Robert Hall

Starring:
Bobbi Sue Luther
Kevin Gage
and Lena Headey

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
A woman wakes up in a coffin with no memory of her past. When she attempts to escape, a killer in a G.I. Joe Destro mask stalks her and other victims with a camera mounted on his shoulder ala Predator.
Is it good movie?
Yep, another silent stalking killer who takes shot after shot, stabbing after stabbing, and just keeps on coming. Weíve seen Freddy, Jason, and Mr. Myers all do this routine nearly hundred times, so what keeps fans returning to such a minimal concept? Gore and lots of nude babes. Indeed, we fanboys are so predictable. If a film, regardless of the quality of script, can at least deliver on those two levels, fans of the genre will watch.

And the new film Laid to Rest brings those key components and appears armed to play. Within the first five minutes or so, blood flows and a hot chick makes an appearance. The killer splatters a funeral directorís head against a door and our victim/hero must run around in a skimpy little outfit and quickly meets your stereotypical hillbilly couple. With that said, I canít in good conscience rely completely on the gore and sex appeal. Letís be honest, kids, there must be more to a movie.

With that said, Laid to Rest succeeds about half the time considering it contains nothing ground breaking. The story plays so minimally basic that you can start the movie, leave after ten minutes to pick a pizza and a six pack of something fancy (perhaps a Wheat or an Ale), and return without ever pausing. You wonít miss anything except some blood. But no fear, there's plenty more of that to come.

The killer emerges as very run-of-the-mill and reminds greatly of two killers. One is from Killer Movie; another movie I recently reviewed where the murderer records all his deeds via camera for later use. The other, well, itís actually tough to decipher considering the Chrome Dome killer has zero personality, the very essence of what made the others so great. Mike Myers and Jason, though silent, created fear through their slight movements, subtle characteristics, and freaking eerie masks. Chrome Dome only reminds of some crazed nut with a G.I. Joe fetish.

If the killer brings little terror, than the tool used better be cool. At first, I wondered if his weapon of choice in a knife would work, but it does. He slices and chops everyone in sight with great pleasure. And in that respect, the one element Laid to Rest effectively succeeds in is the one that counts: gore. The violence effectively remains unsettling as Chrome Dome slits throat after throat and uses his knife in ways I didnít think a blade could.

One of the actors is Sean Whalen, who I only recall as the dude from one of the first Got Milk? ads; the one where a historian eats peanut butter while listening to a radio show and attempts to call in with an answer only to be forted by not having any milk to wash down his meal. Appearing like a poor manís Steve Buscemi, Whalen steals many of the scenes heís in, notably one funny sequence where no one has a phone, so they attempt to report their frantic 911 plea via the net, which becomes anything but easy.
Video / Audio
Video: Widescreen presentation

Audio: Presented with the power of Dolby Surround
The Extras
Notta, had a screener.
Last Call
While not original by any means, Laid to Rest at least includes what fans expect. The killer keeps killing, and the hot lead never stops running.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

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