Six sex obsessed young dudes find out about Mustang Sally and her House of Pleasures. Word is that the girls are hot and ready to do anything you want for the right price. But when they arrive, it seems the ladies have something else in mind.
Well, howdy folks. Are you looking for a good time, with some sexy ladies ready to take their tops off, some questionably ďstraightĒ dudes that love to take a piss standing right next to each other (Victor Salva
would be thrilled) and a few bloodless kills without penetrationÖ of any kind? Mustang Sallyís Horror House
takes on the typical dudes looking to get laid who end up in a brothel film with hot hookers that have another agenda. But they ainít werewolves and they ainít vampires, they are just ladies who have issues. And the way they deal with those issues is bloody murder, without the blood. The kills are so badly done that all you see is a hand stabbing air. And when fights break out, the fist hitís the air. Great stunt choreography here.
I will say that there is one thing worth seeing and that is E.G. Daily
as Mustang Sally. Apparently someone saw The Devilís Rejects
and thought sheíd be cool in the role. And to be honest, she is a lot of fun to watch especially since she is dressed as any good MILF should be. Black undies and a see-through teddy. She looked great and took on the role as best she could with this script. She even performs the title track. If you are a fan, youíll probably want to own this just for her.
As for the rest of the cast, the generically attractive boys and girls are not half bad. They arenít very well written but I did find a few moments of humor with the guys. And speaking of the guys, who is this flick made for? Yeah, we got a lot of naked chicks with tit shots galore, but these guys are often shirtless and they take a piss together in a scene creepier than even Jeepers Creepers 2
. After they take the bathroom break by the trees almost in a huddle, a naked chick comes byÖ so what happens. They really do get in a huddle. I'm surprised they even put their willies back in, they seriously looked like they would dig a cirlcle jerk. There is a lot of dude touching here. And when it comes to sex scenes, itís basically foreplay for the first hour, and then the off-screen killings begin. Iím not kidding, the first murder takes place about forty-two minutes in.
Itís strange to watch actors who seem to have a little bit of talent with a script that has so many strange and dull moments. One of the worst sequences finds the football hero of the group starting to kick assÖ by throwing rocks. It is beyond ďnot-scaryĒ, it made me laugh a little though and I donít think it was supposed to. This house of horror (whores?) is only worth a look for the love of E.G. Daily.
If you are a fan of E.G. Daily, and you want to own everything she has ever done, then this is for you. If you donít know who Ms. Daily is, and you donít want to suffer through non-existent special effects and really boring fore play sex scenes, aside from some groovy boobies, then donít waste your time. Not really badly acted and it looks surprisingly not as cheap as it should. But seriously, if you want a horror film, or even a comedic horror film, I suggest passing right along when you get to Mustang Sallyís place.