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NIGHT THEY RETURNED
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Reviewed by: Andre Manseau

Directed by: SV Bell

Starring:
Melantha Black Thorne
Suzi Lorraine and Elisabeth Faure

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
A sultry pair of twins and their younger sister like to party in their cabin out in the woods. These parties include the torture and eventual cannibalism of kidnapped victims. However, after a barrel of toxic sludge makes its way into the nearby swamp with the remains of the victims, the proverbial 'shite' hits the fan.
Is it good movie?

I'm not usually a fan of movies shot on DV, as they are often inferior (in many ways) to movies on film. However, there have been a few select exceptions to that rule. Unfortunately, this isn't one of them.

The film centers on a pair of twins who bring unsuspecting victims to their cabin so they can have a little fun before chopping them up. Their younger sister (serving as the narrator as well, she fills us in on some backstory) is tied up in another room where they can tease her as they please. As they take out their victims, they wheel out their deceased father's corpse so they can show him what they like to do. I guess daddy would be proud?

The acting is decent, though all the twins really have to do is look good (andthey do) and the victims have to scream while they get covered in their own blood and entrails, which the twins start to wrap around themselves and eat. Vegans, they ain't.

The directing is pretty straightforward. It's not terrible but pretty basic for a DV film. One interesting gimmick added was messing around with the widescreen bars at the top and bottom of the screen. Sometimes it's black, sometimes it changes to red and jagged edges. While that was somewhat interesting, there was also some crude cel-chaded CGI video near the end of the film that was completely out of place, it was strange, and didn't work for me.

A special mention should go to the awesome music in the film, I was a big fan of most of the tunes playing in the foreground and background. Although, I had to laugh at some scenes that were filmed just to showcase more of the music. One of the twins was out trying to find a gun and eventually got one and once she got into her car, she started using the gun to caress herself, stick it between her legs to stroke and then licking it all the while some rock music blared. Not very necessary in the scheme of things but somewhat enjoyable.

The big problem with the movie was a complete lack of story. There were bits here and there but nothing was really expanded upon, especially plot devices like the father's corpse and the younger sister's telekinesis (yeah, go figure) that just seemed to be there for the stupid ending. "The Night they Returned" you should pass on and hope "they" never return.
Video / Audio
Video: Presented in widescreen and shot on digital video, it's alright but nothing to write home about.

Audio: Doesn't say.
The Extras
The disc offers trailers, a behind the scenes making of the movie and a short film in French called "La Terreur Crampante" by Mario Giguere.
Last Call
On the good side of things, the movie has a great soundtrack, lots of gory scenes and ample amounts of cleavage (no nipplage though). On the negative side, almost everything else. Unless you're in it just for the blood, you'll be bored.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

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