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SLAUGHTER HIGH
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Reviewed by: Andre Manseau

Directed by: George Dugdale, Mark Ezra & Pete Litten

Starring:
Caroline Munro
Simon Scuddamore
Carmine Iannaccone

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
Eight different people are invited to their 10-year high school reunion at their now-closed down high school where a former student, disfigured from a prank gone wrong is there to seek revenge.
Is it good movie?
When I was a young lad who used to like to tempt fate, I'd walk by the horror section of my local video store and dare to stare at the cover boxes of movies I would never DARE to watch. A few stick out in my mind as being pretty terrifying, and Slaughter High's was one of them. A skeleton, dressed up in a mortarboard and holding an apple!? GET OUT OF HERE!

So I'll admit, I was pleased as punch to get to review Slaughter High, now that I'm a jaded and cynical horror f*ck who has since destroyed the thrill of scary box art.

This movie sucks out loud, it sucks sucks sucks. And I loved every second of it. I am a guy who loves him some cheesy, cash-in 80s horror garbage and this was right up my alley. It's not an easy thing to endure- you're going to find it a pretty head-smacking journey but dammit, it's fun! It's very, very stupid though, look out.

Mary is the lame nerd who gets absolutely ravaged by mean high school jerks and suffers a bottle of nitric acid to his face (after smoking a laced joint!) on his birthday, which coincidentally falls on April Fool's Day. Of course, this all happens after being seduced by the high school queen bee who leaves him hanging.

In the near future, these jerks get invited to a high school reunion where Marty himself is the head figure in a stupid jester mask and silly looking gardening gloves. Of course, these idiots don't know that he's behind it and they start getting wiped out one by one.

There isn't much more for me to say. This is a by-the-numbers slasher flick that is borderline asinine and completely hilarious at this point. It suffers from "why are these actors all 30 years old when they're supposed to be teenagers" syndrome, stuck in a terrifying old mansion that serves as the school (weird. I know).

How can you hate a movie that has acid in bathtubs, beer that will make your chest explode, electric beds, javelins and hilariously bad sex scenes? Sure, it's weird that only the cool jerks were invited to a high school reunion. Yeah, it's a little strange that the school has become a decrepit haunted house. You might even notice it strange that the school janitor is still employed for some reason.

Point is, if you're looking for stupid, sexist, poorly acted, hilariously scored fun, Slaughter High will be right up your alley. It sucks out loud but as a movie to watch with a crew over some beers and/or your substance of choice, it'll fit the bill just fine.

Video / Audio
Video comes in 1.33:1 Widescreen and looks gloriously awful. You won't use this disc to show off to your friends.

Audio is presented in Dolby 5.1 and sounds as good as it could.
The Extras
There are two commentary tracks here, one by Mark Ezra moderated by “Teenage Wasteland” author J. A. Kerswell and another by Caroline Munro (our 40 year old "teen heroine"), “DVD World” editor Allan Bryce and author and critic Calum Waddell. I won't lie, I couldn't really get through both tracks in their entirety. It's not that they aren't informative but especially the Munro track, it's mostly just an interview rather than running commentary. She seems very friendly, though.

Jesters And Jolts is an interview with Mark Ezra and it runs about 10 minutes long. Pretty standard stuff, how the film came about, and how it got created. He's fairly honest and provides some decent insight into the rushed silliness of this production. It's funny to hear him ripping on the original ending and director of photography.

Lamb To The Slaughter: The Scream Queen Career Of Caroline Munro is a really cool little retrospective look at the career of Caroline Munro, who's been in a lot of stuff like Dr. Phibes, Kronos, Dracula AD 1972 and more. She's a really nice lady and talks about her love of the genre and how's it boosted her career. This is the best feature of the disc without question, and runs about 25 minutes.

Finally, a trailer.

Last Call
This movie is pure 80s trash and should be approached as such. It doesn't stand out as being very memorable, is poorly acted and has despicable, too-old characters. With that said, I loved it and it was given a loving treatment from Arrow Video. Recommended.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

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