Whether or not you're going to be on board with this film really depends on what your cup of "titty tea" exactly is. Do you watch movies solely for sex/nude scenes or do you require an interesting plot/script to go along with your skin? My stance is firmly within the latter, hence this review will come off as more negative than positive.
In place of a compelling plot, we're merely given reasons for women to make out with and undress each other. Now don't get me wrong, that isn't necessarily a bad thing... if you're just looking for payments to take to the spank bank. However, if you want to sit down with your pants on and no lotion in sight, THE ALCOVE simply does not measure up. What sucks is that sometimes it can be fun to watch poorly-dubbed, foreign skin flicks for some unintentional laughs or perhaps a drinking game. Unfortunately, the sex scenes in this movie come off as pretty damn erotic which doesn't mix too well with "party-time joke movie night".
What I'm getting at is that it's pretty damn awkward watching a supposed "joke" movie with your buds when everybody's got a boner half the time! A second example: you wouldn't ride a merry-go-round or play Madden Football or shoot hoops with a chubby. Am I making any sense? Probably not, but I blame the nearly empty bottle of Jack to my left. But let me add: you could probably watch the love scenes with your girlfriend or wife to, you know, get in the mood. But you'd also have to fast forward all the crap that falls in between those down-and-dirty acts, which again exemplifies why I can not endorse this flick as valid movie entertainment.
In case you couldn't already tell, I don't account much for incredible cinematography or extra crisp DVD transfers/enhancement. I don't even mind poor dubbing or subtitles. I just want something that'll keep my interest for at least an hour and a half. That small package did not wash ashore with THE ALCOVE.
Audio Dubbed English 5.1 Dolby Digital
And the flick's trailer. Woo-Hoo!