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THE FINAL DESTINATION
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Reviewed by: Ryan Doom

Directed by: David R. Ellis

Starring:
Bobby Campo
Shantel VanSanten
and Mykelti Williamson

Movie:  
star star star star
Extras:  
star star star star
Overall:  
star star star star
What's it about
Just in case seeing a bunch of hip young folks getting slaughtered in three previous films wasn’t enough, here’s another slice of death with more, er, death than the last Rambo movie (ok, not that much, but there’s a lot of bodies). This not to be confused with the first movie Final Destination as this one as a “The” in the title.
Is it good movie?
I remember seeing the first Final Destination in theaters about a decade ago. It wasn’t the greatest movie ever, but it was enjoyable escapism gore with a pretty interesting and original story. Plus it had the always dependable Tony Todd and the sometimes dependable, if not likable, Seann William Scott. Not that either are superstars, but at least they bring credentials to a project. That’s something that the latest installment, The Final Destination, completely lacks.

The Final Destination is a pale, distant shadow of what the franchise once was. In fact, this movie feels and plays exactly what how the story feels: cheap, fast, and exploitive. Everything lacks beyond death and destruction. Zero character development. Zero tension. Zero suspense. Zero point. It’s as if the producers decided to make an exercise in blood and guts. I can picture the first meeting for the film. Palm trees in the distance. Blackberrys on the café table. Eight dollar espresso before them:“Damn those things called characters. Who needs a story? We’ve got 3D!! Let’s roll with it.” It’s true. Think of majority of horror 3-D movies and name one that delivered anything beyond a cheap scare. Good luck. Of course I know that that’s the point of The Final Destination, but damn, do you have to make it so obvious that no one cared? I wanted to get into it, I wanted to really like it, but with no characters or plot, what’s the purpose of watching this at home if it lacks the theater 3-D experience?

So with that knowledge (and granted, everyone who wants to watch this knows what they’re in for) two question emerge. What’s good and what’s crappy about it?

What’s good? The girls. They are all super hot and there’s one pretty good nudity scene, but don’t expect a classic 80’s film where girls drop their clothes like they’re weighted. No, no. We’re much more progressive as a society and naked girls are no longer a major part of horror. Also, the gore is good. Plain and simple. There’s absolutely zero reason to watch this except for the gore, which thankfully director David R. Ellis gives amble amounts of body parts and innards splattering every few minutes. However, despite all the blood that flows, there’s the major problem of CGI. Nothing looks authentic. Every effect shot shown might as well have had strings attached to it. For a studio release, the CGI is horrendous. Just crappy.

What else is crappy? Everything minus the gore, the girls, and well that’s it. I watched the Blu-ray version that comes complete with a pair of 3-D glasses. Now these obviously aren’t Avatar quality glasses. No, no. These are the classic cardboard ones, and after about ten minutes of the 3-D version, I couldn’t take it anymore. My eyes felt as if someone shoved bamboo splinters into them. Whatever crazy effects worked well in theaters just suck here. 3-D at some does not work. Sorry. What’s even worse is when its viewed in 2-D everything just looks ultra cheesy with scenes seemingly setup just to have some random object shoved in the camera lens. Disappointing to say the least.
Video / Audio
Video: A great looking Widescreen presentation in 16x9. The 3-D version, eh, not so much.

Audio: Presented with the power of DTS HD 5.1 Dolby Digital
The Extras
Body Count: The Deaths of Final Destination: 22-minutes of behind the scenes looks at how they filmed all those wacky death scenes. It’s pretty interesting seeing how low budget movies do it.

The Final Destination: Pre-visualization and Storyboards: Two different deconstructions of the racecar and mall explosion scenes. It covers everything from the storyboards, to previsual animatics, to the actual effects.

Deleted Scenes: It’s pretty funny that half of the nine scenes here are of nothing but people getting slaughtered. What’s wrong with this world?

Alternative Endings: Two different endings. I rarely think these are worth watching, and this isn’t much different. But I always like seeing clips minus effects or music.
Last Call
If someone is just looking for lobotomy inducing experience, The Final Destination will do the trick. It delivers on the gore and the girls, but anyone who desires a little more in their movies will be sorely disappointed. Watch it for the death, and damn, that sounds completely messed up.
ARROW IN THE HEAD'S RATING SYSTEM
star star star star I'D BUTCHER MY FAMILY TO SEE THIS AGAIN
star star star HANG ME BUT I DUG IT A LOT
star star AN OK WAY TO KILL TWO HOURS
star JUST SLING AN ARROW IN MY HEAD AND LET ME DIE IN PEACE

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