THE SISTER OF URSULA
Reviewed by: Jamey Hughton
What's it about
After the death of their father, two sisters travel to an Italian resort hotel for a little R & R. Little do they know that they share the idyllic views of their Mediterranean getaway with a bevy of hot lesbian-leaning Italian women with nymphomaniacal tendencies - oh, and a voyeuristic psycho-killer who rapes women to death with his huge schlong.
Is it good movie?
Barbara Magnolfi plays Ursula, a high-strung clairvoyent who doesn’t seem to be having any fun - mostly on account of the fact that she is being haunted by the “ghost” of her dead father. Stefania D-Amario is Dagmar, Ursula’s sister. Daggie, as she is affectionately called, just wants to get laid (she is, after all, on vacation) but high-strung Ursula keeps spoiling her attempts to catch the eye of Filipo (Marc Porel), a tall, dark Italian drug addict.
Besides that, there is little to no discernable plot in THE SISTER OF URSULA, just a series of supposedly sexy liasons. Ursula wants Filipo, he’s still hung up on the sexy English lounge singer, who’s sleeping with the hotel manager, Roberto, whose wife works at the front desk and is having a lesbian affair with one of the guests. And then, of course, there is the killer who pays big bucks to watch the kinky stuff go down, then whips out a cock so huge it’s a lethal weapon and fucks them all to death. Bring the kids.
Like most traditional entries in “giallo” cinema (an Italian subgenre of thrillers laden with blood and erotica), THE SISTER OF URSULA has some intriguingly stylistic camera work (scenes are marked with layers of deep, saturated colour) and a soundtrack that is... unusual, to say the least. The background music consists mostly of bad 70's synth-recordings reminiscent of bad 70's porno movies. But if you’re looking for a real giallo that does any sort of justice to the genre this isn’t the flick for you.
While this movie is not hard to look at (great scenery combined with bold cinematic choices and hot nude women) and the mystery surrounding the love life of Ursula and Dagmar’s parents is somewhat intriguing, this one never really comes together in the end. The final twist is laughable, the acting is wooden, and there isn’t near enough blood splatter to keep any respectable horror fan entertained for long.
Video / Audio
Video 1.35:1 Widescreen format
Audio Italian Dolby Digital, with English subtitles
Interview with Director Enzo Milioni A 30-minute featurette with Milioni talking about his fondness for his leading lady, the real-life drug problems of co-star Porel, and his struggle to maintain the film’s “integrity” in a clash with producers who wanted to add several more hardcore sex scenes. He reminds me of my grandpa.
For those looking for a 90 minute soft-core porno romp - this may be the one for you. It only takes about three minutes to get into the T & A (and then some). Otherwise, take the advice of your ninth grade health teacher and choose abstinence.