Action Round-Up #45

Last Updated on July 26, 2021

Universal Soldier 3 one sheet!

Arrow update: The fine folks over at
Dolph Ultimate
let us know that there’s a UNIVERSAL SOLDIER 3:
REGENERATION one-sheet out (not sure how we missed that one) and you
can see it right above this article. First thoughts that crossed my mind when I
saw it were what and the f*ck. Like really man, that has to
be one of the most cheap-jack art work I’ve seen a in while. I could’ve done
better with a box of Crayolas and a roll of single layer Cottonelle. It’s
embarrassing  in my opinion and I truly hope that the art work does not
reflect the quality of the flick. The 10 million clams budgeted U3 will hit DVD
shelves on DVD and Blu-ray come January 5, 2010. Get it

HERE! Here’s its synopsis:

When a team of former Soviet radicals seizes Chernobyl and
threatens to unleash a lethal cloud of radioactive gas one hundred times
deadlier than Hiroshima and Nagasaki combined, the US military brings in a
bio-mechanically enhanced super soldier, Luc Deveraux (Jean-Claude Van Damme),
to foil the plot. As Deveraux fights his way into the plant, he faces off with
his now revived former nemesis, Andrew Scott (Dolph Lundgren), and a newly
‘updated’ Next Generation Unisol (former UFC Heavyweight Champion Andrei
Arlovski), in a battle of battles, and must save the day.

 

Salt Poster / Trailer!

The awesomeness of Angelina Jolie’s upcoming action flick SALT hit us two-fold this week, first with the JoBlo.com exclusive poster, as well as the debut of the film’s kick-ass trailer!

Killer action, a smokin’ hot heroine, and even Liev Schreiber shows up in the mix. You want popcorn movie fun next summer that won’t treat you like a complete moron? You want a little bit of BOURNE mixed with THE LONG KISS GOODNIGHT? Then check out the greatness that is SALT!

Enjoy the trailer and the new poster, and get ready for SALT in theaters July 23, 2010.

Seagal: TV Lawman!

If you thought Steven Seagal was just an aikido master, action-movie actor, and all-around ladies man, then you’re totally right. Except you probably didn’t know he’s also a deputy sheriff in Louisiana. But you will now with his new A&E show STEVEN SEAGAL: LAWMAN. Here’s the show’s premise…

For almost 20 years, Seagal has been working as a fully commissioned deputy with the Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office in Louisiana. In addition to going out on patrol, Seagal is an expert marksman who has worked with their SWAT team and has instructed Jefferson Parish officers in firearms and hand-to-hand combat. Steven Seagal Lawman will allow fans to ride shotgun with Seagal as he and his hand-selected elite team of deputies respond to crimes in progress. Then, when Seagal goes off duty, the cameras will continue following him as he pursues his many ventures, including musical performances and philanthropic efforts in Jefferson Parish and New Orleans. He also cooks.

This should be called STEVEN SEAGAL: PIMP-DADDY. What a f*ckin’ awesome idea for a show, and from the looks of the trailer below, what a great way to spend a few hours a week. It’s COPS meets HARD TO KILL mixed with OUT FOR JUSTICE. As he so calmly puts it, “this ain’t no joke.” No shit. I can’t wait. STEVEN SEAGAL: LAWMAN hits the A&E networks December 2nd, at 10pm (PST).

Hannah action!

Imagine a movie where Hannah Montana uses an Uzi to blow people away. Admit it, you’d pay good money to see a movie like that. Well, that may not be too far off, as ATONEMENT director Joe Wright is in negotiations with Focus Features to direct a little action thriller called HANNAH.

What the f*ck is Hannah? Check it: Hannah centers on a 14-year-old Eastern European girl who has been raised by her father to be a cold-blooded killing machine. She connects with a French family, forms a friendship with their daughter and goes through the pangs of adolescence. When the girl is dragged back to her father’s world and discovers that she was bred as a killing machine in a CIA prison camp, she must fight her way to a free life.

Little girls bred as killing machines? Thins THE PROFESSIONAL meets UNLEASHED, and there you go. If done right, I think I could really dig on this flick. And depending on the casting, something like this could go into cult status quite quickly. ATONEMENT director though? An odd choice, but what the hell! Everyone deserves a shot at directing action flicks!

50 Cent & Kilmer’s Gun!

Variety reports that Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson and Val “King of STDs” Kilmer are teaming back together again in the straight to DVD action flick THE GUN, from writer… 50 Cent? Get the hell outta here!

No, it’s true… true to the bone. To be directed by Jesse Terro , THE GUN goes like this: 50 Cent and Kilmer play friends whose loyalties are tested when they get caught up in the world of illegal gun dealing.

I hope to god their names are really 50 Cent and Kilmer in the script. I’d shit myself if that were the case. This, of course, is a reunion for the action STD stars, who last saw the small screen together in STREETS OF BLOOD with the lovely Sharon Stone. I guess it was a bigger hit than either you or I had previously thought.

Filming for THE GUN is set to begin next month in Grand Rapids, MI.

Seagal’s KEEPER trailer!

If you thought STEVEN SEAGAL: LAWMAN meant Seagal was hanging up his ass-kicking STD roles, you’re wrong. On January 19th, courtesy of Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, Seagal’s back in the game, blowing shit up, and protecting the innocents in THE KEEPER! Yee-haw!

THE KEEPER goes a bit like this: Steven Seagal unleashes his wrath – and his fists – in this fast-paced thriller about an ex-cop caught in a web of deceit, racism and murder. Chock full of high-octane stunts and eye-popping action, The Keeper is a nonstop adrenaline rush. Double-crossed by his rogue partner and forced to retire, Los Angeles street cop Rolland Sallinger (Seagal) accepts a gig guarding the beautiful daughter of a wealthy businessman. But when mobsters kidnap the girl, Rolland’s job turns from protector to hunter as he untangles a dangerous web of lies and murder. Now, in a race against time, Rolland must use his wits, weapons and brute force to get her back – before it’s too late.

Nice! You can check out the explosive new trailer below, pre-order your very own copy RIGHT HERE, and get ready for Seagal in ass-kicking gun-fighting mode with THE KEEPER on DVD everywhere January 19, 2010!

Far Cry Trailer!

The new trailer for the upcoming Uwe Boll directed action flick
FAR CRY
(READ ARROW’S REVIEW HERE) appeared online recently, and it surprisingly doesn’t look like Boll’s usual share of schlock!

Starring Til Schweiger, Udo Kier, and Emmanuelle Vaugier, FAR CRY is about two Seattle reporters who investigate the deaths of mercenaries on an island off the coast of the Pacific Northwest.

I live in Seattle, I used to live on an island in the Pacific Northwest… this is pretty much a movie based on my life! Or not. Anyway, enjoy the new trailer below, and get ready for some FAR CRY action on DVD November 24th!

BUY FAR CRY HERE!

KILL YA NEXT WEEK WITH MORE
ACTION!