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Blood Clots (Movie Review)

Blood Clots (Movie Review)
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PLOT: A collection of horror stories curated by Freedom Cinema, consisting of shorts by New York distributor Hewes Pictures. Featuring cannibals, zombies and other funny creatures, the collection is made up of seven short, gore-filled stories that will surely please the fans of the genre. Whether it is an awkward dinner with an ancient creature in "The Call of Charlie", or a rightfully justified fear of basements in "Time to Eat", Blood Clots has it all.

REVIEW: The new horror anthology BLOOD CLOTS starring SILENCE OF THE LAMBS star Brooke Smith is a collection of horror stories curated by Freedom Cinema, consisting of shorts by New York distributor Hewes Pictures. The anthology stars many recognizable actors such as the above mentioned Smith, along with Harry Sinclair (LORD OF THE RINGS), Madalina Bellariu Ion (YOUNG POPE), and Kristin Slaysman (THE LAST TYCOON, MASTERS OF SEX) among many others.

First off, let it be known that I love a good horror anthology flick. From CREEPSHOW to TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE to BODY BAGS, horror anthologies are always more than a welcome addition to my horror movie must-see lists. And I especially love a solid mico-budget horror anthology ala VOLUMES OF BLOOD and THE WITCHING SEASON. All of that said, I guess you could say I was more than primed to enjoy this new anthology featuring stories directed by Evan Hughes, Sid Zanforlin, Luke Guidici, Carl Timms, Patrick Longstreth, Timothy J. Richardson, Martyn Pick and Nick Spooner. So did I enjoy it? Here and there. Like any horror anthology, the segments contained within BLOOD CLOTS were hit and miss. This is always the case with any horror anthology you check out (unless it's the original CREEPSHOW or CAT'S EYE) and so it really comes down to whether or not the good outweighs the bad. And in this case, I'm glad to say that the hits outweigh the misses. 

The first segment is called "Hell of a Day" and features a woman trapped in an abandoned gas station during the zombie apocalypse. One of my favorite aspects of this entry is just how brutal the tale is to its lead heroine. Whether she ends up a zombie or not by the time the end comes, I'll never tell, but I will say that she gets mighty banged up in the process - both physically and mentally. This was a solid entry boasting slick photography and a winning lead performance. Let's hope the rest keep up this quality!

The second segment is called "Never Tear Us Apart" and features two guys who run afoul of a husband and wife team of cannibals out in the deep, dark woods. This entry is super-gory with a half-head decapitation that's one for the books - regardless of budget. That said, this segment felt super-short and ended with a twist that didn't make a lick of sense. But it was fun while it lasted.

The third goes by the title "Blue Moon" and it tells the tale of a group of dirty pornographers filming their trade out in the middle of the woods at night (of course) and there new young subject turns out to be more than they bargained for - and not in a good way. What's interesting about this segment is that it explores a subgenre of porn that I was unfamiliar with (I swear) and so that made for, dare I say, an educational watch. Sleazy, sinister, silly, and surprising, this entry featured an occasional found footage style and was one of the funnier bits contained within. This would make for a killer feature film.

Moving on to the fourth entry in this anthology, "Time to Eat". This silent entry features a little boy, his mother, and their pet monster in the basement. This was the weakest entry in the bunch and the less said about it might be for the better. At least it was short. The fifth entry is called "Still" and this was my favorite of the bunch. The segment centers on one of those living statue guys during the zombie apocalypse. Blood, guts, and teeth surround him. But none of the zombies know he isn't a statue. So in the middle of a massive massacre (band name), he must hold completely... wait for it... still. Classic, total classic.

The sixth is called "Hellyfish" and features a group of killer jellyfish that have been mutated thanks to an undetonated A-Bomb in the sea. This entry features a killer credit sequence and is loaded with fun and funny good times, including a bounty of babes and blood on the beach. Like the above mentioned "Blue Moon" this entry is yet another example of a short from this anthology that needs to be made into a feature ASAP. Even more so actually. Sure, it suffers from it's low-budget, and its comedy stylings are a bit too silly for its own good, but I could see this turned into a SyFy feature (ala SHARKNADO) by this time next week.  Plus it features a trio of hot triplets in bikinis... which is always nice.

And finally, the seventh entry is called "The Call of Charlie". This is the entry that stars Brooke (SILENCE OF THE LAMBS) Smith. It features an older couple throwing a dinner party... and one of their guests is Cthulhu. It's as strange as it sounds. Especially considering that Cthulhu only has his trademark head, while the rest of his body is dressed in a blue button up and pressed khakis. This is sure to be most people's favorite entry, I'm thinking, but it did little for me. I get it and I'm not hating on the segments production value, acting, effects, or general storyline (which are all pretty fantastic). It's just not for me. And fair enough. It is pretty funny in parts though. 

Overall, this seven-segment micro-budget horror anthology is fun as hell if you're forgiving of low-budget features. If you're like me and find micro-budget films inspiring, you'll find plenty to love and learn from BLOOD CLOTS. And even if you're not such a student of low-budget cinema, you'll still find plenty to love as this movie boasts everything you could want in a Friday night fright flick. There's twist, turns, blood, gore, and Halloween-style fun for days. I highly suggest checking this film out on VOD. Like V/H/S and/or HOLIDAYS, this film is one of those "perfect for playing at a party" horror anthologies. Enjoy!

Extra Tidbit: BLOOD CLOTS hemorrhages on Vimeo and Amazon starting August 3rd.
Source: AITH

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