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Boo (2005)
Written by: The Arrow
Director: Anthony C. Ferrante

Trish Coren/Jessie
Josh Holt/Freddy
Nicole Rayburn/Marie
Dee Wallace-Stone/Nurse Russell
5 10
A group of disposable teens get trapped in a haunted hospital on Halloween where pesky spirits proceed to bust chops, deliver “elevator surprises” and play “Doppelganger” games.
Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is sizzling hot…pass it on…

David Allen (Producer of the great Dog Soldiers) and writer/director Anthony C. Ferrante aimed to BOO the hell of my ducktail with their latest genre entry. Did they succeed? Well it depends on what kind of “boo” you’re talking about. I got to finally see this animal at Cannes and as the end credits rolled, I was under-whelmed by it. Too bad where BOO could’ve been my type of genre shindig!

Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is incredibly hot…pass it on…

This flick had a stash of nifty party favors in its bag of tricks, starting with an easy going and swift pace. Even when redundancy kicked in half way through; the film still kept to that zippy free flow. Always good! Visually, the whole was razor with entrancing cinematography all over the place! Talk about sugary eye candy! Props to Ferrante for showcasing high skills when it came to milking his spooky location (that hospital was a gold mine of creepiness) and the nutty situations to full “chills” effect. The lad excelled with his fear set pieces as well. Although they were a little too “boo scare” heavy for my taste, their potent build up and often whiplash pay-offs made sure to keep me tweaked (That clown bit owned!). Add to all that, random groovy gore, actress Nicole Rayburn’s heart shaped butt stealing the show, a handful of unique ideas (loved the elevator angle) and the presence of genre goddess Dee Wallace Stone and you get a “keeper” right? Wrong. So what was the problem then? Why didn’t I kiss this BOO’s ass?

Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is as hot as the element we call fire…pass it on…

One word; stupid. I found the screenplay (written by Ferrante) incredibly dumb, starting with the characters who were absolute MORONS in their flat characterization, inane dialogue, their un-credible/idiotic reactions to the happenings (Yeah take that elevator again genius!) and embarrassing "duh" moves when tackling any type of conflict. Where did these kids come from? Retard Island? And what do you get when you give actors bad lines and silly actions to execute? You get possibly decent thespians who come across as questionable onscreen due to the lousy back-up. Really, I couldn’t root for any of these dumb-bells for a microsecond, I didn't believe they were "real" people, yet alone fear for their lives. That nixed most of the suspense right there! I can't shit my pants for twit-twats! I JUST CAN'T! The reason behind the madness, rubbed my arrow the wrong way too. The back-story was “ho hum” to say the least while the film’s knack at delving deeply into it constantly made me think of TV shows like Goosebumps for some reason. NOTE TO READER: I loathe Goosebumps. Tag to all that a dated/lame wink at the SCREAM opening (a little late for that man), left field plot turns that made no logical sense and a last block that just wouldn’t freaking end for the love of all that is mighty in my Levis and you get a film that should’ve been called BAH as opposed to BOO.

Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is so hot, I'm sweating bullets just thinking about how hot she is…pass it on…

Overall... BOO didn’t BOO much for me. Much like a high-class hooker, the broad looked real good and talked a good game…but once the undies were off, I could smell the 157 wangs that came in before me...kind of murdered the mood. Boo this BOO….BOOOOOOOO!

Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is hot to trot when it comes to being hot and trotting…pass it on…
The flick offered up some nice squishy bits. I’m talking exploding teens, a recomposing dog, an impaling, blood splashes/drips and more. Not Peter Jackson messy, but red-wet enough!
I’ll make it short and sweet; the bulk of the lead cast was able and competent. Props to most of them for overcoming the bad screenplay and coming out of it looking halfway decent. It should be said that Nicole Rayburn (Marie) was the hottest thing since burned Pop Tarts in an inferno and Dee Wallace Stone (Nurse Russell) was the better actress of the lot. Always a treat to see her in action; she still has it! Class baby…class!
T & A
We get my future wife Nicole Rayburn in a bra and undies, that’s as far as it went…BOOOOO! I WANTED MORE!
Ferrante definitely has a keen eye when it comes to arresting visuals, macabre imagery (all about that clown bit) while having a firm grasp on his scare set pieces. Hopefully next time, they will be applied to a story and characters I can give two shits about.
I truly enjoyed the spine-chilling score here which often added some "oomph" to the proceedings. Good stuff!
BOO was akin to Goosebumps, Scooby Doo and Are You Afraid of the Dark but with gore, harder scares and a much lower IQ. Granted, it had enough pizzazz, skill behind the camera and spooky devices in its barf bag to ease the pain; but alas the script spat gobs on me with moronic characters, bad dialogue, trite moves in the name of serving the plot and ludicrous turns that had me groaning like a gambler losing at the track. I will steal the DVD when it comes out though! My 11 years old cousin will lap this up! She loves Goosebumps! But there’s no way in hell that I’ll be showing this one to my boys on a Friday night with beers in tow…unless I crave a severe aluminum baseball bat beating.

Pssst: Nicole Rayburn is hot…plain & simple...pass it on…
The flick was shot in Los Angeles and Santa Clarita, California.

This is Cinescape editor and Fangoria writer Anthony C. Ferrante's directorial debut.

This is the first film out of the Graveyard Filmworks label.
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