Clash of the Titans (2010)
Director: Louis Leterrier
Jason Flemyng/Calibos / Acrisius
In old time Greece; we silly humans think it a good idea to diss the Gods. Of course Zeus (Neeson) and company will have none of that jive so they give us an ultimatum: sacrifice your hottie princess or be wiped off the face of the earth. Thankfully, half man, half God Jake Sully…ummm…I mean Perseus (Worthington) stands between us and total destruction.
I’m a HUGE fan of Desmond Davis 1981 original CLASH OF THE TITANS. I watched it recently and it still held up! There’s just something about that film that does it for me. Call it nostalgia; call it a boner over Ray Harryhausen’s stellar stop motion animation effects, or just call it affection for a tight flick…I simply love it. And I had high hopes for this remake as well! I dig on director Louis Letterier’s eye for heart crushing action, the money seemed to be onscreen and Sam Worthington is all good in my books. So yeah as I headed to my preview screening I was pumped but at the same time I kept praying to Zeus that the screening would be in 2D.
Why? Well as you may know; CLASH OF THE TITANS was not shot to be in 3D, it was converted to 3D (in ten weeks) in Post only after AVATAR raked in the dough. I had heard that the result was abysmal and wanted to duck the pain. Sadly my screening was in 3D and the experience was even worse that I could have imagined. The effect brought NOTHING to the film, total opposite, it took away from it; the action scenes were blurry, I got countless headaches and found myself removing my glasses often to see the film better. I strongly suggests you do NOT shell out the extra dough to see Clash of the Titans in 3D; it’s a complete sham. Pay LESS for 2D and see the film in better quality. There’s a reason why AVATAR took years to pull off! Shame on the Studio for this “out of the box 3D” con on the audience.
So how was the film itself? It was okay. The original is the better picture though, with a more developed story, relationships and characters and more biting visual effects to boot (the Medusa in the original runs circles around the one found in this remake… not scary enough). CLASH 2010 was what I like to call a connect the dots flick. Its set its stage and then connected the dots in the most predicable and challenge-less fashion, then the credits rolled. The story had the depth of my lint filled pockets and the layers of a Cottonel square (Can you feel the softness f*ckers?) but that didn’t mean there wasn’t fun to be had with it none the less. I was swiftly reeled in by its eye friendly aesthetics; the grandiose scenery, the rich production designs (loved the underworld), the enthralling action sequences (Letterier’s camera was all up in that money-shots ass…sweet!) and the countless beasties with aces designs/ top notch CGI execution behind them.
Now I can’t really comment on the acting; because well there wasn’t much of it going on. Hard to have any kick in when you have no relationships (no that pitiful, half a thought love story didn’t count) or real characters to work with. With that spat, Sam Worthington did what he had to do well (why was he the only dude in the film with a buzz cut though, he needed long hair like everybody else, more Jake Sully than Perseus), seeing a bunch of veterans (Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes) whoring wigs and cashing checks was a hoot and the Bond reunion going on (Gemma Arterton and Mads Mikkelsen) had me smiling. Mads is the man and Gemma was so hot my eyes burned….. damn! Finally the pace of the thing was pretty easy to endure, the rousing score by Ramin Djawadi was on the money and the small nod to the original (Bubo the robot Howl in da house) was appreciated by this CLASH fan.
Alas, like I already hurled, the story here was more of an outline than a full fledged narrative and the characters sported little defining traits…. they were just there – so that took away from the film. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t asking for Shakespeare here, I knew the kind of film this was, but still, a semblance of an effort to give dimension to the peeps and the situation would have been swell and made the whole even more compelling. The same went with the lack of tension; there should’ve been suspense, I should have rooted for the hero… but I didn’t. Perseus was never in any real sort of danger and what was to come was so telegraphed that I couldn’t be bothered in giving much of a shit. Like I vomited before, connect the f*cking dots.
So on the whole; CLASH OF THE TITANS 2010 worked as an entertaining yet cold and simpleton visuals/action/cgi monster spectacle and that was pretty much it. Do with that what you will just don’t damn me man, damn the Gods!
We get a couple of severed limbs, dudes turned to stone and some arm burns. Nothing stood out really.
T & A
I’d tap Medusa a quattre pattes!
CLASH OF THE TITANS 2010 had no heart, no soul and if you’re seeking a testing story, look elsewhere. But if it’s a handful of exciting action bits, groovy monsters, zany camera work and fly CGI all strung together by a flimsy storyline you crave, you came to the right hole in the ground. The film did make for a good time waster no doubt, one that I forgot all about 5 seconds after leaving the theater though. Maybe if I hadn’t seen the movie in “we’ll f*ck you out of money with 3D that lessens the film’s quality” I would’ve dug it more, who knows? Back to the original I go and will stay.
I was sure I saw Michael Ironside in there, in a bit role as one of the Gods, but he’s not in the credits, was I tripping?
Ray Harryhausen did the effects for and co-produced the 1981 original which was a huge hit when released. Ray retired from filmmaking shortly after the movie was released.
Leterrier sought out Ray Harryhausen for his remake, he wanted none of it.
Director Stephen Norrington first signed on to do the film but was unsure as to how to go about it. Louis Leterrier (a big fan of the original) contacted Norrington through their and winged replacing him.
DAMN THE CLASH 2010 SITE HERE