ARROW IN THE HEAD REVIEWS

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Season of the Witch (2010)
Written by: The Arrow
Director: Dominic Sena

Starring:
Nicolas Cage/Behmen
Ron Perlman/Felson
Claire Foy/The Girl
Robert Sheehan/Kay
5 10
PLOT-CRUNCH
Two master ass kickers, medieval Knight dudes (Cage and Perlman) who booked out on the Church and the Crusades happen upon a village consumed by a severe plague. The villagers blame the mess on a young hot chick (Foy) who may or may not be a witch. The two Knight dudes are to get the trinket to some monks to be judged one way or another. Let the CGI jamboree begin!
THE LOWDOWN
Ahhh good old January aka dumping month; a time when Studios usually get rid of the films they don’t have much faith in and force feed them down our throats. How I love thee! A joy for any reviewer. Yes that is sarcasm by the way. The only reason I was remotely excited to doggy SEASON OF THE WITCH (which saw its release date bumped up once and went through re-shoots last September) was that some peeps had told me that it sucked so much ass; that it was hilarious. I don't know about yall, but I’m always up for a so bad its good slice of celluloid cheese pizza and ya know what it’s pretty much what I got out of this sucka. To be fair to the film; it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I was expecting another lemon like THE WICKER MAN REMAKE; but SEASON OF THE WITCH had its shit way more together than that turd of turds.

Yup, SEASON OF THE WITCH did some of it right. It had an easy going pace, some cool action scenes (loved the sword fights in the beginning) and enough intentional and unintentional laughs to be entertaining on varied levels throughout. Although Dominic Sena has yet to live up to his first and last great film, the 1993 KALIFORNIA ( I gave up on him ever doing so BTW); nobody can take away the fact that he has a keen eye behind the camera. I so grooved to his use of slow motion here and the countless sweeping areal shots he put out hit the spot. This was a good looking flick; when CGI and green screen stayed out of the picture that is, but more on that later. Moreover; I dug the performances here. Yeah it took me about 15 minutes to “believe” Nick Cage as a Knight (his Yank accent and hair piece threw me off at first) but once I got into the ride he didn’t bother me none (and yes he had one classic Nick Cage freak-out and yes it owned). In fact he was very amusing to watch and his gnarly chemistry with the hilariously dead pan Ron Perlman pulled many chuckles out of me. It was almost as if both actors knew they were in a so-so flick so they decided to make the most of it and have a blast. And props to the supporting cast while I'm at it, they did a bang on job; specially taking into account the material they had to work with. Claire Foy as the witchy gal and Robert Sheehan as the ambitious young buck Kay stood out the most for me via their strong shows. The camera loved both of them and they brought genuine intensity to their roles.

The thing that hurt SEASON OF THE WITCH though, that held it back from being more than what it was, was the flimsiness of its script. The initial premise was tantalizing and had mucho potential; but it didn't go far or deep enough with it to do it justice. Character development was weak tit to say the least and apart from some cool sword play early on and a slick “get the wagon over a rotting wooden bridge” bit nothing really stood out to back-hand me stupid and leave a mark. Same went for the film’s witch-chick element; they could've done so much more with her  in terms of the “is she or isn’t she a witch” question and her role within the bulk of the narrative. But alas that was not to be. On top of that; some of the dialogue was cringe inducing but hey... at least I got a couple of cheap giggles out of it (yes the fact that the whole cast had very modern American accents when they were supposed to be in old times Europe added to the fun). And was it me or did the CGI and green screen look pretty crappy? Somebody skimped on the Post production budget that's for sure! Too bad; maybe with better visual effects some of the action scenes would have had more impact (like that evil wolves go nuts sequence) and the finale would have been a killer instead of a meh way to leave the audience. Finally; you gonna do a movie of this ilk, a horror adventure if you will, with dashes of classic Hammer spread about for good measures; don't pussy out on the violence man... it makes no sense. Its like getting a head-job with a condom... half pointless.

On the whole; I saw SEASON OF THE WITCH, laughed a few times, didn’t get too hurt along the way and now that its over; I will forget it quicker than I can spell w-h-o-r-e. Now that I think of it; its an ideal hang over movie. One to put on the next day after a hard night of drinking when you want to watch something and not have to use your brain much to process and digest. DONE!
GORE
The flick really went for that PG 13 and it showed; we get off screen beheadings, a light stabbing, some nasty plague makeup and Nicolas Cage’s hair piece.
T & A
Nicolas Cage hair piece was naked.
BOTTOM LINE
SEASON OF THE WITCH rolled on quick and painless; put out some intentional/unintentional laughs, decent acting and a handful of slick action scenes. Bummer that the story rarely went beyond its initial premise, that the shoddy visual effects often lessened what could have been superior physical horror get-downs and that the violence was watered down to Kool-Aid level. Like I said before; it's an ideal hang over movie; other than that... whatever man.
BULL'S EYE
Filming of the flick took place mainly in Austria, Hungary, and Croatia.

Season of the Witch tried to get a PG out of the MPAA; it was submitted twice; but they always came back with PG 13.

The script was penned by screenwriter Bragi F. Schut
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9:51PM on 01/13/2011

Awful.....

Lets just say my "Worst of 2011" has already started and this film sits firmly at the top. Garbage time-waster.
Lets just say my "Worst of 2011" has already started and this film sits firmly at the top. Garbage time-waster.
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+0
10:05PM on 01/11/2011

'' wrong SEASON ''

I AGREE, SEASON OF THE WITCH had sooooo much potential, with the cool premise , my boy NIC, the UBER -COOL RON PERLMAN , foxy Claire Foy, I kinda picked up , from the trailers , that this would have far more of the ' IS SHE/ ISN'T SHE 'witch angle as well, instead of nearly scratch !! BUT in the end , once more , another Limp-Dick effort from Sena (who I'M beginning to doubt , had anything to do with Kalifornia)and unfortunately Cage , though he did liven up a SHITE script, with PERLMAN , who
I AGREE, SEASON OF THE WITCH had sooooo much potential, with the cool premise , my boy NIC, the UBER -COOL RON PERLMAN , foxy Claire Foy, I kinda picked up , from the trailers , that this would have far more of the ' IS SHE/ ISN'T SHE 'witch angle as well, instead of nearly scratch !! BUT in the end , once more , another Limp-Dick effort from Sena (who I'M beginning to doubt , had anything to do with Kalifornia)and unfortunately Cage , though he did liven up a SHITE script, with PERLMAN , who hasn't really OWNED since MATCHSTICK MEN !!
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12:32PM on 01/08/2011
Spot on with the review!
Spot on with the review!
Your Reply:



1:32PM on 01/07/2011

Dominic Sena = Crap

I agree completely Arrow. Sena's produced turd after turd since Kalifornia. But I will rent this.
I agree completely Arrow. Sena's produced turd after turd since Kalifornia. But I will rent this.
Your Reply:



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