ARROW IN THE HEAD REVIEWS

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Watchers (1988)
Written by: The Arrow
Director: Jon Hess

Starring:
Corey Haim/Travis
Barbara Williams/Nora
Michael Ironside/Lem
Lala Sloatman/Tracey
PLOT-CRUNCH
A government lab explodes and two creatures escape. One’s a very smart golden retriever and the other a lame, cheap looking bigfoot wannabe. They’re new biological weapons. You see the creature is obsessed about killing the dog, wherever the dog goes, the creature goes, anybody that’s in the way gets slaughtered. The creature: the missile, the dog: the heat. Crazy government agent Lem (Ironside) is hot on the creature’s trail while the dog befriends another shaggy mammal…Corey Haim…In this movie everybody is chasing everybody.
THE LOWDOWN
This film is based on a Dean Koontz novel. Having not read the book I came in with no expectations. Sad to say that the concept is kool but the execution is very poor. Witnessing Mr. Haim have conversations with a dog is very painful to watch and there’s a lot of that in this movie. The pace is slow to say the least and you really don’t care about any of the characters or the events that take place. The movie comes alive only when Michael "badass" Ironside is on the screen and we don’t see him enough. I know that in the book, it’s a man that befriends the dog, I guessed they changed it to a boy, thinking that Haim would bring in the crowds…they were wrong…Lets feed the dog so he can stop chasing his tail…
GORE
They kind of cheat us in the blood department…maybe so the "Haim" fans(8 year olds) can get to see the film. We do get eyes gouged out and a great scene when Ironside wants to "talk" to the Sheriff. I love the way he talks…he he he. For a movie about a killer "Bigfoot" it’s pretty damn dry.
ACTING
If you like Corey Haim (Travis), you’ll like his performance, if you hate him…you’ll want to chop his head off. I personally have nothing against the man (except that atrocious haircut) but I don't think his persona fits in a horror film. He cheapens it (like in Lost Boys). Stick to "License To Drive" bud…BTW where’s Feldman? Michael Ironside (Lem) is amazing again as the psycho agent and I relished every second he was on screen. Barbara Williams (Nora) does a good job and holds her own against master thespian Haim. Lala Sloatman (Tracey) also comes through in the limited screen time she’s given. BTW did you know she dated (slept with)) Corey Haim…what a surprise!!!
T & A
Nada.
DIRECTING
The only well directed sequence is the opening one. The rest of the movie looks like some guy running around with a video camera on his shoulder. The director’s idea of style is shaking the camera real fast. Wow.
SOUNDTRACK
Pretty exciting score for such a tedious movie. It sounds a lot like the "Rambo" soundtrack (same composer John Williams), but the music can’t fool us…we know the movie is boring…nice try…
BOTTOM LINE
The only reasons to see this movie is "Michael Ironside" who chews up the scenery like a rabid "acting" beast and the dog who is one well trained puppy (also a great actor). Other than that, no scares, the monster looks like a guy in a monkey suit, Corey Haim thinks he’s an actor and the kill scenes are suspenseless and goreless. Read the book…It can’t be worst than this snore.
BULL'S EYE
Lala Sloatman (Tracey) is the niece of musical genius "Frank Zappa.

A movie filmed in BC Vancouver is not complete without it’s favorite son "Jason Priestley" who makes an appearance in this one as a kid on a bike…and no we don't see him get ripped apart.

The way "The Sheriff" gets dispatched in this film was Ironside’s idea…he said he wanted the death to be "hands on" so they let Ironside do his stuff…it worked, probably the best scene in the film.

Corey Haim eventually went bankrupt, now lives in Montreal and frequents the same video store as I do…see ya around, Corey!
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