Within the Rock (1996)
Director: Gary J. Tunnicliffe
A bunch of miners are sent on an asteroid to drill and blow it to smithereens (yep, it's heading towards earthâ€¦sounds familiar) but their important mission is interrupted when they unwillingly free a buried creature from its rocky grave. The creature goes on a rampage and the crew must fight for their lives (with fire extinguishersâ€¦ouuuâ€¦exciting!).
Slap "Alien" and "Armageddon" in a blender, take out the punch and you get this tepid offering. At least if the film delivered some kind of tasty candy it wouldâ€™ve maybe been worth my while but you wonâ€™t find any sweets here. First off, how many montages of guys drilling can a dude take? I almost jumped out the window, saying goodbye to this cruel world. ENOUGH!!! Second of all, what wuz that creature all about? He looks like a handful of "Corn Flakes" come to life (cheesy). The movie takes an hour to kick in, the characters are hardly developed, the space scenes look like a "screensaver" (the worst I have ever seen), the kill scenes are boring and the pace has the speed of a drunk hooker crawling on her knees.
The film has no balls either. When it gets the chance to be more than just another "Alien" clone, it bails out on it. For an hour all I was hearing wuz: "we have to drill fast, the asteroid will collide with the earth". When the creature pops out and disrupts their drilling duties (I think for a couple of days) I was sure the movie would cap off with them on the rock colliding into the earth. AT ALL! The movie solves the main threat (the imminent collision) in the blink of a corpse to focus on the "Corn Flakes" monster. What was the first hour of the film for? ALL THAT DRILLING??? WAY TOO EASY MR. SCREENWRITER! The movie also serves us one of the dumbest twists this side of Anne Hecheâ€™s love life by having a character interrupt the final battle with the creature so that he could beat up on his own crew (I guess he didnâ€™t notice that huge monster with them, what an idiot!!!!).
I will give the movie this: All of the actors are decent. Iâ€™d like to give a big shout out to Barbara Patrick who just rocks the house in this one: BARBARA, YOU RULE! The sets also look great and the dreadful mood is there. But the movie is un-involving, dumb and too generic to entertain. I donâ€™t mind a good Alien rip-off but this one canâ€™t even do that right. Whereâ€™s the tension? Where are the thrills? Not here. Within The Rock belongs within the garbage.
The best part is one of the characters getting drilled in the head. I also liked the sucked off face. The creatureâ€™s resurrection is also kool. OK.
Xander Berkeley (Ryan) plays yet another a-hole. He does it well. Too bad he disappears halfway through. Caroline Barclay (Dana) does well as the scientist, her pouty lips help. Bradford Tatum (Cody) handles his part very well and even shows a hint of depth. Barbara Patrick (Samantha) steals the show as the explosive nut. She has the best lines and looks good. Brian Krause (Luke) is wasted here. What was his character about anyways? He was just there! Too bad, I liked him in "Sleepwalkers". Duane Whitaker (Potter) does what he has to do and looks great in a cap. Michael Zelniker is effective as Archer but his character kind of annoyed me.
T & A
"In Space EVERYBODY keeps their top on"
Nice mood but the director goes overboard with the montages. He also fails to create tension and even resorts to moronic boo scares to try to jolt us (didnâ€™t get me). I did like the montage of the crew preparing for battle (reminded me of Rambo) and enjoyed a few slick shots.
Some hard rock and some classicalâ€¦no N-SYNC here.
It looks good, has decent acting and Barbara Patrick is the shite! Too bad the film plods along slowly, makes too many dumb moves and is way too dĂ©jĂ vu. It definitely needed more guns to liven things up, that fire extinguisher stuff is for the birds. I do recommend that you rent the flick if youâ€™re an insomniacâ€¦trust meâ€¦it will knock your arse out!!! Zzzzzzzzzz...
Robert Patrick (T2) co-produced. Barbara Patrick (Samantha) is his wife (great taste bud, she looks like a keeper).
Duane Whitaker played in Texas Blood Money (which he co-wrote) with Robert Patrick and also played the gay shop keeper in Pulp Fiction.