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C'mon Hollywood #92

06.01.2006

... give Olivia a comeback role!
by Sturdy

There comes a time in every man’s life where he must stand up and profess a love that is no longer accepted by society. Perhaps I was inspired after watching Jake and Heath battle their feelings Brokeback style (wait, is that insulting? I can never tell.), or maybe I’m just finally comfortable with my feelings as a man. Either way, it’s time the world, errr…the two people reading this (HI MOM!) know that I am, and always will be in love with Olivia Newton-John.


Don’t worry boys, she’s still got it.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking: “Well of course you are, she was brilliant in Xanadu”. Yes, that’s true. She was quite breathe-taking in XANADU, but my love runs deeper than just roller skates. I was there when she wowed America as Sandy Olsson in GREASE. Ok, I wasn’t actually “there”, but let’s just say I own the DVD. And, for the record, Olivia in GREASE is one of the single most beautiful women in all of film. I stood by her through TWO OF A KIND and…well…that just about sums up her movie rolls. She’s had some physical and personal problems through the late 80’s and 90’s, but now, 23 years later, I’m asking for her to make a triumphant return to the big screen, much like her two time co-star John Travolta.


Yes, it is as bad as it looks, but she was in it.

You might now be thinking: “But Sturdy, she’s been focusing on her music, surely you’ve enjoyed the sweet sound that is Back With a Heart". Well of course I enjoyed her comeback album, who didn’t? Anytime that woman speaks it’s as if she’s verbally making love to my eardrums. I won’t even mention the fact I saw her in concert…wait…I’ve said too much. I’m all for her making more music, but this is C’mon Hollywood, not C’mon Recording Industry. But cheesy music is one thing, and starring in a movie is another.


I always preferred innocent Sandy to slutty Sandy.

Now is the perfect time for a beautiful, wholesome woman like Oliva Newton-John to make a comeback and save America from it’s downward moral spiral. Ok, maybe not, but we could use some good ole Sandy innocence and now is as good of a time as any. With the success of CHICAGO and MOULIN ROUGE, the singer/actress is now just as accepted as the actress/singer. The groundwork has been laid for her glorious return.

There were rumblings of a GREASE 3 in the works. I’m not sure that’s what I had in mind, but if she comes back and gets to flash those pearly whites in my direction, then I’m game. You can’t deny the popularity of GREASE. Heck, even Johnny T gets involved in the reunions every now and again. Ok, the more I think about it, the more another sequel to GREASE would not be a good idea.

So Olivia, you’ve had the time to sort through your health and personal problems, so put them aside and get a role in the next musical. It doesn’t even have to be a musical, but get something. Because I, for one, miss you.

Who’s with me? Hello? Anyone? Ehhh…..

Tags: Hollywood

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