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The Poster Roaster!

04.16.2003

Who doesn't like to make fun of movie posters, right? Well, we're gonna try to turn that basic, childish ability into an actual column by our resident quizz-master INDIANA SEV himself. This week catches him raking a couple of new releases over the coals in CHASING PAPI (April 16) and MALIBU'S MOST WANTED (April 18).

10. Originally titled: My Big Fat Spanish Threesome
9. Yo, is that Sandy Bullock?
8. Is that dude's chest airbrushed enough for you?
7. Looks more like this guy's CHASING P***Y!
6. It's cool to see John Stamos working again.
5. The tagline: Three Women, three cities, three times the trouble. They forgot only Three weeks in theaters!
4. The last time I saw this many Latin beauties was in The Mambo Kings.;)
3. This guy looks like he'd be happier with Antonio Banderas if you catch my drift!
2. This is 23rd romantic comedy in a row to feature a stupid dog!
1. Add Penelope Cruz, substract the dude and I'M THERE!

10. Another movie that makes white people look stupid. I thought that's what Kangaroo Jack was for?
9. I love its tagline - "This Spring Don't Be Hatin'". Oh, I'll be hatin' all right. Three guesses as to what I'll be hatin'.
8. Isn't that the dude from The Offspring video?
7. "Ever feel like you don't belong?" I'll tell you who don't belong in this movie: Taye Diggs. This guy used to be a legitimate actor...somebody's slumming.
6. Any predictions as to how many times Jamie Kennedy cracks us up by saying "dog" in this film?
5. Snoop Dog can't recall what they paid him for this bomb. Word is he smoked his paycheck.
4. Oh, I get it. Lame white guy acts like a black rap artist. Yeah, that's actually a pretty funny idea...in 1996!!
3. Taye Diggs had that same expression on his face after screening this dud.
2. Malibu's Most Wanted is set to be released in theaters on April 18th. The DVD release date is scheduled for May 8th.
1. I hated actor Jamie Kennedy as a white guy. Now I can hate him as a black guy too.
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 Do you like this new column? Should we do more/less? Tell us below.

 

 

Source: JoBlo.com

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