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C'mon Hollywood #42

01.19.2005

...I wanna see 'The Brown Bunny' already!
by Indiana Sev

Billy Brown:
“Just look like we are a married couple, spanning time!”

--- Buffalo ‘66

After I saw Vincent Gallo’s brilliant feature-length directorial debut, 1998’s BUFFALO ’66, I knew right away that he was going to be one of those directors that I would follow forever. The movie was just like my prom night – it was funny, original, stylish, sweet and sick.

So, I waited patiently for his second project for 5 long years until THE BROWN BUNNY was completed. The movie tells the story of Bud Clay, a professional race car driver who drives cross country, making strange requests of women (also like my prom night) he meets along the way, all in the hopes of getting his one true love out of his mind. Now that actually sounds pretty damn intriguing, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, the movie also contains a scene in which an actress (Chloë Sevigny) visibly gives him oral sex, and since we all still live in the 19th century, the always moral (ahem!) Hollywood community is keeping a distance from the project, which is why it never received a general release. I guess they thought they’d better concentrate on more important works, such as this summer’s Bernie Mac opus: MR. 3000.

The greasy Gallo got into some pretty hot water two summers back when, after disagreeing over a bad review given to THE BROWN BUNNY at the Cannes Film Festival by film critic Roger Ebert, Gallo wished cancer onto him (the worst I ever did was wish Roger a mild case of gangrene for his lukewarm review of the brilliant RAISING ARIZONA). As shocking as that comment was, things got even hairier later on when Ebert was actually diagnosed with cancer. It is to note that since then, Gallo apologized, cut 26 minutes from the film, Roger re-watched it, gave it 3 out of 4 stars and has kept his cancer at bay. Hmm...

So, with a controversial movie on his hands, a notoriously peculiar directing style (Christina Ricci is said to have been reduced to tears on several occasions while filming BUFFALO ’66) and now, with the proven ability to curse people with deadly diseases, it’s no wonder Vincent has found himself in the Hollywood doghouse. But I don’t care about all that hooey – I just want to see the movie for myself and make up my own goddamned mind!! Won’t somebody please distribute this movie already? Release it on DVD!! Download it and send it to me? I’ll be sure to give it a good review since the last thing I’d want is for the director/warlock to give me leprosy. I just want to see it already!

Okay, admittedly, it might make many people uncomfortable watching an Oscar-nominated actress visibly perform fellatio onscreen, but I say better her than Nathan Lane, right? Besides, if JoBlo.com’s Johnny Moreno liked it, it has to be good! Nobody knows more about hummers on film than our very own correspondent from The Windy City, who saw the film this past summer and stayed on to attend a Q&A with Gallo afterwards (read his review + Q&A here). By the way Johnny, you still haven’t returned the "Best of Jenna Haze" DVD I lent you, bro!

All I know is, the soundtrack, the director, the trailer, the cast and the premise are all leading me to believe I will get a real kick out of this movie. So, as a movie fan, is it too much for me to ask to get a look at the thing already? Until that day comes, I suppose I can drown my sorrows at www.brownbunny.net or the equally entertaining and wacky home of the great Vincent Gallo, www.vincentgallo.com.

Is Vincent Gallo the coolest man alive? No. But he comes pretty f*ckin’ close…

PREVIOUSLY:

...the Golden Globes are overrated! (January 14, 2005)
...where the f*ck is Bridget Fonda?! (January 7, 2005)
...my year-end roundup (2/2) (January 1, 2005)
...my year-end roundup (1/2) (December 30, 2004)
...your X-mas spirit sucks! (December 24, 2004)
...Norm MacDonald = box office gold! (December 15, 2004)
...reunite the Reservoir Dogs cast! (December 8, 2004)
...cancel 'Inside the Actor's Studio'!! (December 3, 2004)
...I give thanks to thee (2/2) (November 26, 2004)
...I give thanks to thee (1/2) (November 24, 2004)

C'mon Hollywood... archives here

Source: Indiana Sev
Tags: Hollywood

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