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Top 20 of 2006 1/2

01.05.2006

Top 20 Most Anticipated of 2006

The Fountain still

We're very passionate about our movies so we'll admit, we were intially reticent in accepting 2006 for fear that she would bring only disappointment and failed opportunities. We've been burned too many times so for us to accept yet another year into our hearts, it would take something very special. However, after cooling off and perusing the movies coming out this year in compiling this list, we realized that we were just being needlessly pessimistic and paranoid. We've regained that twinkle in our eye that we had the first time we saw Robert DeNiro obsess over a pretty blonde and make friends with an underage prostitute. So, here, folks, is JoBlo.com's list of our top twenty most anticipated films of 2006. They're in alphabetical order so don't think we necessarily prefer one over the other.

THE ASSASSINATION OF JESSE JAMES BY THE COWARD ROBERT FORD

Release Date - February 3rd

The name alone piques our interest but adding Brad Pitt as a notorious western figure just makes it all the more sweeter. There's also the fact that the lesser-known Affleck, Casey, co-stars opposite Pitt and we're glad he's finally getting some recognition. He's not been in anywhere near the amount of clunkers The Benster has been in and the blockbusters he has been in include mega hits like OCEAN'S ELEVEN and OCEAN'S TWELVE. It's about damn time he stopped living in the shadow of The Benster! You're still great, Ben, but this is Casey's time!

The Assassination of Jesse James still

BANDIDAS

Release Date - February 3rd

It's no secret that we harbor very strong feelings for a certain Latina goddess by the name of Salma Hayek. However, we're not about to let her cloud our judgement. No, BANDIDAS made the list based on merit. Not only was it written and produced by French dynamo Luc Besson but the trailer looks like a rollicking good time, and it also stars Spanish hottie Penelope Cruz and funnyman Steve Zahn. And, honestly, isn't the measure of a movie's worth how much of Salma there is in it or how many references there are to Salma?…

…um, sorry, were we talking about something? The last thing we remember is somebody saying something about Salma's measurements and looking at this picture thinking how lovely a fireplace would look in our house with Salma.

Bandidas still

CARS

Release Date - June 9th

Yes, the trailers haven't exactly inspired confidence but when has Pixar ever disappointed us? That would be a big fat never. In just a few short years, they've established a reputation for excellence second to none. We'd be silly dingbats not to give them the benefit of the doubt and not judge the movie based on a couple of trailers. Yes, it's possible that they'll falter at some point but it won't be now and it won't be with CARS. We fully expect it to uphold Pixar's stellar reputation and if it doesn't, well, let's not go there. Because things could get very ugly.

Cars still

CASINO ROYALE

Release Date - November 17th

We fully realize that the Bond franchise has deteriorated essentially into cartoon. We're willing to suspend quite a bit of disbelief but when Bond escaped a massive tidal wave caused by a satellite harnessing solar energy by using an iceblock that broke off with just the right dimensions for him to surf to safety, like all of you, we let out a profound "come the f*ck on!!" And this isn't even taking into account his invisible car and the genetic procedure that caused that one guy to use that bizarre dream contraption. Yes, we get it. However, CASINO ROYALE is based on a novel that shows a Bond who kicks the requisite ass without all the fancy schmancy gadgets and, God forbid, without having to tidal wave surf with his invisible car. No, he does it the old-fashioned way - with fists and a meat cleaver. Further, director Martin Campbell has promised to stick to the novel's portrayal of Bond and strip away all the fluff crap that's made the movies the butt of many jokes. And while we're still on the fence about Daniel Craig, we're willing to give the guy a chance. Just don't f*ck this up - that means you, Craig and Campbell.

Casino Royale still

THE DA VINCI CODE

Release Date - May 19th

A Tom Hanks and Ron Howard collaboration about a mysterious murder in the Lourve that unravels a controversial web of intrigue within the Catholic Church? We're so there! To be honest, though, we were just about ready to completely pass on THE DA VINCI CODE seeing as how everybody and their pet gerbil couldn't stop talking about how the book it's based on is great and how we really really should read it and how Dan Brown was on the "Today" show recently doing some fun stuff with code-breaking and have we heard about that book he wrote and if we want, they'll buy us a copy and send it to us because it's that good. We were this close to ignoring everything relating to that book when we decided to actually read the damn thing and realized it's not too bad at all. Then Ron Howard signed on to direct and Tom Hanks to star and when they said Audrey Tautou was playing the female lead, we totally wanted to see it. We're even slowly warming up to Hanks with the long hair.

The Da Vinci Code still

THE DEPARTED

Release Date - August

In the upcoming THE DEPARTED, not only is Martin Scorsese returning to his GOODFELLAS and MEAN STREETS crime drama roots but he's doing it with the help of Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio and Jack Nicholson and with a story based on the excellent Hong Kong thriller INFERNAL AFFAIRS. Wow, we just said that out loud and slabbered a puddle of drool all over the office carpet. By the way, did we mention Nicholson plays a crime boss who's predisposed to walking around with strap-ons? Because he is. And he does. Yeah, we're excited about this one. And you should be too. If you aren't then you're dead inside.

The Departed still

THE FOUNTAIN

Release Date - Not Yet Known

If we have to tell you why we're looking forward to Darren Aronofsky's THE FOUNTAIN then clearly you don't understand us and frankly, we're hurt. After all we've been through? Our feelings aside (we're still hurt, mind you, but we'll let it slide…for now), Aronofsky is one of the most staggeringly original filmmakers working today and THE FOUNTAIN is an epic story that melds several genres. Plus, it stars Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz and we're significantly big fans of both, especially Weisz seeing as how she has, you know, the hot female parts.

The Fountain still

GRIND HOUSE

Release Date - September 22nd

At some point when we were probably distracted with a particularly bouncy sweater puppet or two, "Quentin Tarantino Presents" became a sub-genre. Not that we begrudge QT for "presenting" flicks that otherwise wouldn't get as much exposure but we've been eagerly anticipating him getting to work on at least one of those eight thousand projects he has in development. Which is where GRIND HOUSE comes in. This little nugget is a collaboration with Robert Rodriguez where each will write and direct an hour-long old school horror flick complete with fake trailers in between both movies. They're supposedly starting production this month and that's just about all we need to send our geek hearts into an uncontrollable ventricular tachycardia.

Quentin Tarantino pic Robert Rodriguez pic

LADY IN THE WATER

Release Date - July 21st

It'd be easy to say that M. Night Shama-boo's THE VILLAGE was a big stinking turd, that his patented "twist ending" was more of a crutch than an innovation and that maybe he should look beyond the gimmick and get back to worrying about story and character development. See, we just said it. However, Shama-glock almost single-handedly resurged interest in horror (yes, SIXTH SENSE was a horror movie despite whatever sub-genre moniker it's tagged with) and has consistently made original and thought-provoking movies. Basically, don't discount The Shams because he's still a talented motherf*cker. Moreover, LADY IN THE WATER shows no signs of having a "twist" and has an intriguing and original story - superintendent of an apartment complex finds a nymph-like creature in his complex's water system trying to find her way to her own world. The only thing we're slightly uncomfortable with is calling it a "bedtime story". We get it, it's cutesy and the kids will love it but if it's fine by you, we're not calling it that.

Lady in the Water still

MIAMI VICE

Release Date - July 28th

There's been reports of several delays and plenty of "diva" attitude from Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx on the set of Michael Mann's MIAMI VICE. If it's true, we'd be lying if we said it didn't lower our anticipation of the film a tad. Because we start asking questions like "why is it being delayed? Does that mean it'll suck?", or "why is Foxx acting like a beeyotch when not too long ago he was making BREAKIN' ALL THE RULES? And do we really need to mention STEALTH?" or "should Farrell really be diva-ing when ALEXANDER was such a phenomenal bomb?" Ultimately, though, we trust Mann to make a great movie and if the trailer's any indicator, he did just that. Further, if Farrell and Foxx wanna be diva ninnies, we won't let it bother us too much so long as they don't start throwing phones at bellhops. (hey-o!!)

Miami Vice still

Come back tomorrow for part 2!

Source: JoBlo.com

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