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Bill Condon's next job? Directing Breaking Dawn

04.28.2010

Everyone can sleep soundly this evening, BREAKING DAWN, the fourth film in the TWILIGHT saga has a director.

This brave soul is Academy Award winner Bill Condon (KINSEY, DREAMGIRLS).

Condon has the task of trying to make BREAKING DAWN as buyable as possible. No longer debating about a choice between necrophilia and bestiality, Bella gets knocked up on her honeymoon in what I like to think of as the most awkward, cheesy "sex" scene ever. However, the pregnancy is quite trying because she has a f*cking blood draining vampire in her womb.

As you already know, a lot of weird ass stuff happens. "Spoilers" ahead: The wolves want to annihilate the baby, Edward wants Bella to get an abortion, vampire baby breaks Bella's ribs and severs her spine, Edward gives a c-section with his teeth, and finally Jacob falls in love with the infant.

So how do you make this movie seem less insane? It's nearly impossible unless you take out the majority of the book.

Condon is great, but I just have no hope for this...at all.

Extra Tidbit: Stephenie Meyer is a habitual line stepper.
Source: Summit

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4:38AM on 04/29/2010

MAD-props to you Niki...

for your Charlie Murphy's True Hollywood Stories quote. Your street cred just shot up by 10 points.

"As you already know, a lot of weird ass stuff happens. "Spoilers" ahead: The wolves want to annihilate the baby, Edward wants Bella to get an abortion, vampire baby breaks Bella's ribs and severs her spine, Edward gives a c-section with his teeth, and finally Jacob falls in love with the infant."

Seriously...I really don't want to believe parents are letting kids and young teenagers read
for your Charlie Murphy's True Hollywood Stories quote. Your street cred just shot up by 10 points.

"As you already know, a lot of weird ass stuff happens. "Spoilers" ahead: The wolves want to annihilate the baby, Edward wants Bella to get an abortion, vampire baby breaks Bella's ribs and severs her spine, Edward gives a c-section with his teeth, and finally Jacob falls in love with the infant."

Seriously...I really don't want to believe parents are letting kids and young teenagers read this shit.

But it's happening. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!
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11:45AM on 04/29/2010
All I have to say about that is..."Blouses."
All I have to say about that is..."Blouses."
12:49AM on 04/29/2010
dont forget the showdown at the end where they talk to the bad guys for FOREVER then stand around and use some mind powers, then talk MORE then everyone walks off. its SO climatic, you might just break the seat as you hang on the edge the whole time.
dont forget the showdown at the end where they talk to the bad guys for FOREVER then stand around and use some mind powers, then talk MORE then everyone walks off. its SO climatic, you might just break the seat as you hang on the edge the whole time.
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11:08PM on 04/28/2010
Awesome! I've read the series and I'll admit that it was weird reading Breaking Dawn but overall it was good. Bill Condon is an impressive director but this will be one tough job to tackle. I am confident he can do it though.
Awesome! I've read the series and I'll admit that it was weird reading Breaking Dawn but overall it was good. Bill Condon is an impressive director but this will be one tough job to tackle. I am confident he can do it though.
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10:21PM on 04/28/2010
Condon is decent (loved Kinsey, hated Dreamgirls), and yes, this installment will be fucking off the wall unhinged lunacy, but this series sucks. I have read all the books, and seen both of the current movies, and it just sucks. Emo for goth kids and hipsters.
Condon is decent (loved Kinsey, hated Dreamgirls), and yes, this installment will be fucking off the wall unhinged lunacy, but this series sucks. I have read all the books, and seen both of the current movies, and it just sucks. Emo for goth kids and hipsters.
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9:26PM on 04/28/2010
This movie is going to be insane!!!
This movie is going to be insane!!!
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5:23PM on 04/28/2010
Bill fucking Condon is directing another installment in "Mormonism: the movie." Wow. Who else are they going to get? Sam Mendes? Clint Eastwood? Steven Spielberg? Bullshit
Bill fucking Condon is directing another installment in "Mormonism: the movie." Wow. Who else are they going to get? Sam Mendes? Clint Eastwood? Steven Spielberg? Bullshit
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5:48PM on 04/28/2010
I'm a Mormon, I hate the Twilight Series. The only thing Mormon about the whole series is that it definitely goes the "No Pre-Marital sex" route. That's it.

Stupid comment with a lot of ignorance behind it.
I'm a Mormon, I hate the Twilight Series. The only thing Mormon about the whole series is that it definitely goes the "No Pre-Marital sex" route. That's it.

Stupid comment with a lot of ignorance behind it.
6:25PM on 04/28/2010
There's so much more than that. Do your research.
There's so much more than that. Do your research.
7:26PM on 04/28/2010
Idiot. I'm a Mormon. Not a wannabe... I'm a bonafide one, real one. I've seen the movies... there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, outside of the premarital sex thing that has anything to do with Mormonism.

And what research would you be referring to, outside of the, I don't know, watching it variety and actually being a Mormon who's very familiar with the history and beliefs of the religion?

Twilight isn't to Mormonism what Battlefield Earth is to Scientology.

Fun fact: Battlestar
Idiot. I'm a Mormon. Not a wannabe... I'm a bonafide one, real one. I've seen the movies... there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, outside of the premarital sex thing that has anything to do with Mormonism.

And what research would you be referring to, outside of the, I don't know, watching it variety and actually being a Mormon who's very familiar with the history and beliefs of the religion?

Twilight isn't to Mormonism what Battlefield Earth is to Scientology.

Fun fact: Battlestar Gallactica IS Mormonism on screen. The original more so, but even the new one kept many of the original elements that the Mormon creator of Battlestar put into the show.

And finally, I think a lot of the negative approvals of your comment shows that a lot of people don't agree with your point.
7:31PM on 04/28/2010
Now, I'm willing to let bygones be bygones... but I take personal offense to Twilight being called "Mormonism: The Movie" because any Mormon with any grasp on what Mormonism is will you tell you very clearly Twilight is not a veiled attempt to preach Mormon doctrine.

I will give you this one thing though: Since the creator of Twilight is a Mormon, the influences of how that would affect her life would obviously come through in her creative decisions. But still, point is, Twilight is not
Now, I'm willing to let bygones be bygones... but I take personal offense to Twilight being called "Mormonism: The Movie" because any Mormon with any grasp on what Mormonism is will you tell you very clearly Twilight is not a veiled attempt to preach Mormon doctrine.

I will give you this one thing though: Since the creator of Twilight is a Mormon, the influences of how that would affect her life would obviously come through in her creative decisions. But still, point is, Twilight is not "Mormonism: The Movie."
8:30PM on 04/28/2010
holy fuck that kid just got owned.
holy fuck that kid just got owned.
10:19PM on 04/28/2010
You are being a douchewad.

While, I am not one, I am dating a Mormon, and have a few friends that are, and none of them (including my SO, there are 8 that I see/ hangout/ talk to on a regular basis, and I know that's not a ton) like this wretched series, and they all claim that it has little to no Mormon backing in terms of their teachings, aside from the already pointed out pre-martial sex thing, which is in a ton of other religions as well, thus making that the sole reason you are calling
You are being a douchewad.

While, I am not one, I am dating a Mormon, and have a few friends that are, and none of them (including my SO, there are 8 that I see/ hangout/ talk to on a regular basis, and I know that's not a ton) like this wretched series, and they all claim that it has little to no Mormon backing in terms of their teachings, aside from the already pointed out pre-martial sex thing, which is in a ton of other religions as well, thus making that the sole reason you are calling this such idiotic.

Coincidentally, that's what you are being: idiotic, prejudiced, and an overall ass.
5:22PM on 04/28/2010
As a guy who has never seen a Twilight movie, if all that makes it into the flick I'll HAVE to see this one.
You hear that? IT'LL BE A MUST SEE, DAMN IT!
As a guy who has never seen a Twilight movie, if all that makes it into the flick I'll HAVE to see this one.
You hear that? IT'LL BE A MUST SEE, DAMN IT!
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5:15PM on 04/28/2010
haha Niki! You are the go-to Twilight news breaker on this site.. I love it... You say fuck the haters I like Twilight.
haha Niki! You are the go-to Twilight news breaker on this site.. I love it... You say fuck the haters I like Twilight.
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+2
5:03PM on 04/28/2010
Stephenie Meyer also is getting a producer credit for BD also. Uh-oh.
Stephenie Meyer also is getting a producer credit for BD also. Uh-oh.
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