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Clare's Mortal films

11.02.2009

Because nothing goes together like teens and supernatural creatures these days, Unique Features and Constatin Film have teamed up to bring us THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS, a film series based on a best-selling book series written by Cassandra Clare. So on a scale of BLADE to TWILIGHT, where are we falling here?

“[The] story revolves around teenager Clary Fray's search for her missing mother, which leads her to a city filled with mysterious fairies, raucous warlocks, vampires and other demons.”

"Cassandra Clare has created a truly unique, imaginative and universally appealing world seen through the eyes of a 16-year-old girl," said Robert Kulzer, who will produce for Constantin.

So I’d say about a seven? At least we’re moving on from ONLY vampires, as presumably these ones don’t sparkle and the other monsters might actually be you know, frightening. I’m sure there’s a love story in there somewhere, but it can’t be as insane as a girl trying to kill herself over and over just so she can catch a glimpse of the boyfriend who ditched her. Yeah, watch that NEW MOON trailer again.

Extra Tidbit: Who's read the books? Good, bad?
Source: Variety

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8:42PM on 11/02/2009
Clary will probably ride a unicorn, and be courted by Fabio. When they find her mother, it'll be revealed that she's actually the Queen of AnnRiceland. The werewolves will have a shirtless breakdancing street battle against a gang of fairies in popped-collar polo shirts. Robert Pattinson will have a cameo as an extra in the background masturbating.
Clary will probably ride a unicorn, and be courted by Fabio. When they find her mother, it'll be revealed that she's actually the Queen of AnnRiceland. The werewolves will have a shirtless breakdancing street battle against a gang of fairies in popped-collar polo shirts. Robert Pattinson will have a cameo as an extra in the background masturbating.
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11:02PM on 11/02/2009
I'm sorry, Red4. But that just sounds like the most awesome movie ever made. In a completely warped, Awfully Good kind of way.
I'm sorry, Red4. But that just sounds like the most awesome movie ever made. In a completely warped, Awfully Good kind of way.
3:50PM on 11/02/2009
Haven't read the books but the next film producer that wants to turn anything involving vampires into a film/tv show etc. automatically wins the "no originality whatsoever" award. I feel inundated by all of this...vampires are now the crutch to the uncreative. Think of a new idea please!
Haven't read the books but the next film producer that wants to turn anything involving vampires into a film/tv show etc. automatically wins the "no originality whatsoever" award. I feel inundated by all of this...vampires are now the crutch to the uncreative. Think of a new idea please!
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3:32PM on 11/02/2009
the books were pretty addictive
the books were pretty addictive
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