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Crawford's loose foot

May. 20, 2009by: Daniel Barna

When it was announced earlier this year that Zac Efron was dropping out of Kenny Ortega's FOOTLOOSE remake, my world collapsed. I lay bed-ridden in my room for weeks, pleasuring myself only twice a day instead of thrice, and limiting my daily intake of McDick double cheeseburgers to three instead of four. I just couldn't eat. Now comes news that gossip guy Chace Crawford will replace Efron, and my world once again makes sense. One hunk who can barely act for another. One square-jawed, fake-tanned teen idol replaces another. The world actually works. The trees are green, the left side of my pillow is forever cold, the Blue Jays will win the pennant, and FOOTLOOSE will change the way we watch movies. Sorry James Cameron, it's true.
Extra Tidbit: When I was living in New York I pretended to be Chace Crawford to get laid.
Source: Variety

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10:50PM on 05/20/2009
hysterical article. I hope this dude's career crashes and burns.
hysterical article. I hope this dude's career crashes and burns.
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+0
8:28PM on 05/20/2009
Why even waste an article on this shit?
Why even waste an article on this shit?
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3:59PM on 05/20/2009
Once again Daniel Barna, you prefectly capture what I have been feeling. It's like we're soulmates
Once again Daniel Barna, you prefectly capture what I have been feeling. It's like we're soulmates
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2:12PM on 05/20/2009

ZZZZZZZ

If making this movie absolutely destroys this dork's career, I'm all for it. Have at it Chace, Kevin Bacon you ain't my friend!
If making this movie absolutely destroys this dork's career, I'm all for it. Have at it Chace, Kevin Bacon you ain't my friend!
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2:13AM on 05/20/2009
Perfect sarcastic twist spinning this article. You're exactly right, Barna: who gives a fuck? lol
Perfect sarcastic twist spinning this article. You're exactly right, Barna: who gives a fuck? lol
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