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Four-minute Guardians trailer proves everything truly is bigger in Russia

09.15.2016

I've actually been looking forward to the Russian film GUARDIANS for a while now. It just looks so f*cking bonkers and awesome! Like, this is what I imagine a movie would look like if a five-year old was hopped up on comic books and Red Bull and forced to write a script. And that's not an insult! This seems to just be balls-to-the-wall badass, with little regard for anything else. I mean, there's a giant Bear-Man SHOOTING HELICOPTERS WITH A MINI-GUN! How can you not love it?

To be fair, there is a plot, and it's probably overly-convoluted and over-stuffed - especially judging by this new trailer. But that's not necessarily a detriment. When you hear a movie contains a Bear-Man destroying an army with a giant mini-gun, plot isn't the reason why your butt is in the theater.

Anyway, here's the new trailer:

Again, I'm all in. And, honestly, the story sounds cool. A secret cabal of heroes created to protect the Soviet Union, disbanded after its fall, and are now called back in for a new threat? It brings a different tenor to the proceedings (do they feel remorse working for the prior government? Or even more interestingly, does the film glorify that era?) I think it's always good to see that heroes exist on both sides of a political conflict, although, again, I'm not sure if the film glorifies the politics of Cold War Russia (which seems to be backstory anyway), but I'm still interested to see how they handle that context.

But who gives a shit about politics, story, or context. A Bear-Man shot down helicopters with a f*cking mini-gun! Come on! They've already sold at least one ticket. Although, hopefully they have a showing with subtitles, because that dubbing suuucks (though, even if I understand the hard work that goes into it, I'm not a big fan of dubbing in general. Not even from Studio Ghibli).

So what about you guys? You guys excited like I am? Or do you not like having joy in your life?

Extra Tidbit: GUARDIANS is a big-budget Russian film coming to the US that somehow wasn't directed by Timur Bekmambetov.
Source: YouTube

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3:37PM on 09/16/2016

This ain't Bollywood

If this was some Bollywood weird ripoff, I wouldn't even give is a second glance. But, Russia coming out with their own superhero movie? Awesome. Its like watching that parallel universe where Superman is Russian (Red Son I think). The effects look pretty good too, cheesy as all hell; but good. Some of this appears "borrowed" from some of our style, but who cares. We have Altered Beast with a mini-gun amirite?
If this was some Bollywood weird ripoff, I wouldn't even give is a second glance. But, Russia coming out with their own superhero movie? Awesome. Its like watching that parallel universe where Superman is Russian (Red Son I think). The effects look pretty good too, cheesy as all hell; but good. Some of this appears "borrowed" from some of our style, but who cares. We have Altered Beast with a mini-gun amirite?
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9:50PM on 09/15/2016
Trash. I bet only Trump supporters will be watching this. You know, the deplorables.
Trash. I bet only Trump supporters will be watching this. You know, the deplorables.
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11:45PM on 09/15/2016
Wobble off to your van Hillary and take some fiber and geritol, and get those kids out of your yard.
Wobble off to your van Hillary and take some fiber and geritol, and get those kids out of your yard.
7:18AM on 09/16/2016
Do you actually like movies - you only seem interested to come on this site and spew negative bullshit comments all the time
Do you actually like movies - you only seem interested to come on this site and spew negative bullshit comments all the time
3:41PM on 09/16/2016
I am no Trump supporter, but if this is playing at my Alamo Drafthouse, I'll be the first one there just to watch the pre-show. You know this is a movie site right? Might want to head over to Huffington Post to discuss deplorables.
I am no Trump supporter, but if this is playing at my Alamo Drafthouse, I'll be the first one there just to watch the pre-show. You know this is a movie site right? Might want to head over to Huffington Post to discuss deplorables.
7:13PM on 09/15/2016

NICEEEE

Looks dope to me. Is it dubbed ? I don't like terrible bad dub movies lol.
Looks dope to me. Is it dubbed ? I don't like terrible bad dub movies lol.
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6:29PM on 09/15/2016
Excellent - already looks better than any Justice League film - go Guardians

Excellent - already looks better than any Justice League film - go Guardians

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3:39PM on 09/16/2016
Just had to throw that in there eh?
Just had to throw that in there eh?
5:26PM on 09/15/2016

They had me at Bearman with a mini-gun.

Cue "In Soviet Russia" jokes in 1... 2...
Cue "In Soviet Russia" jokes in 1... 2...
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