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08.15.2014by: Alex Maidy

Top 10 Expendables Spin-offs We Want To See

With THE EXPENDABLES 3 hitting theaters today and production gearing up for THE EXPENDABELLES, the question becomes what else can these actors do besides a straight military action movie? The truth is, there are tons of ideas that could make for an original spin-off using the same cast of retro action heroes. Here is a list of 10 ways you could shake-up THE EXPENDABLES franchise and make a kick-ass new movie. If you have an idea, feel free to add it to the talk back below.

#10 - Wes Anderson vs Paul Thomas Anderson vs Paul WS Anderson

That's right: Directorial Expendables! Bring in filmmakers who are so completely different in scope and style and have them direct different aspects of a single film, similarly to how the Wachowskis and Tom Tykwer handled CLOUD ATLAS. The changing of aspect ratios has become a cool trick in some recent IMAX films, so why not changing genres in the same movie? Yeah, this one may be a bit ridiculous, but it would be totally cool, too.

#9 - Fallen Oscar Winners

Take any actor who has won an Oscar and done nothing with their career since and throw them a machine gun and a cigar. Cuba Gooding, Jr could lead the squadron alongside Halle Berry and they could try to redeem the pathetic excuse for an acting resume they have built in the years since winning the golden trophy.

#8 - Geriatric Commandos

SPACE COWBOYS proved even retired actors can kick some ass. While the EXPENDABLES squad is pretty damn old as it is, bring Donald Sutherland, Tommy Lee Jones, and Clint Eastwood back, maybe even Harrison Ford, Al Pacino, and Robert DeNiro and give these old coots some weapons and walkers. Christopher Lee and Plummer would make great additions as well!

#7 - Eastern Expendables

You could easily make any nationality their own EXPENDABLES movie, but why not go with an all Asian cast? You could have Jet Li's character set up the team and pull in Jackie Chan, someone long discussed for a role in the franchise, along with any number of big actors from China, Korea, and Japan. Add Ken Watanabe and Chow Yun Fat and you have your movie halfway cast. That would be awesome. John Woo to direct, anyone?

#6 - Frat Pack

If the fight scenes from both ANCHORMAN movies didn't prove it, well choreographed battles can be hilarious. Now, take the same approach to those Will Ferrell movies and put the same cast in THE EXPENDABLES and you have one hell of a movie. Imagine TROPIC THUNDER if the movie within the movie was what we actually got to see, but played for laughs. Bring Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Will Ferrell, and all of the other contemporary comedic actors in and just have them improv the script for THE EXPENDABLES. That would be worth the price of admission.

#5 - Science Fiction

The fake trailer for MACHETE...IN SPACE had it right: everything is better on a spaceship! Send these guys into orbit and have them fight an intergalactic foe, human or alien, and you have the ultimate popcorn cheese-fest. A lot of these guys have made shitty direct to Redbox flicks with the same premise, but put them all together with a halfway decent director and you may have a worthwhile movie.

#4 - Pro Wrestlers

For whatever reason, professional wrestlers all think that they are actors but only a few have actually broken through like Dwayne Johnson. Still, you could easily populate a movie with these guys. Steve Austin appeared in the first EXPENDABLES, but bring him back as another character alongside Rowdy Roddy Piper and Hulk Hogan, maybe a few contemporary wrestlers, and throw them some weapons. Could make for a fun movie.

#3 - Blaxploitation

There are plenty of classic actors from the 70s genre who would make a cool team. Maybe have Terry Crews have to assemble his own squad and pull in Melvin Van Peebles, Richard Roundtree, Fred Williamson, Robert Hooks, Jim Brown, and maybe Pam Grier. They may be too old for the action, but they could always shepherd a young team of emerging talent. Hell, throw Eddie Murphy in for a comeback role and you may have a winner. A slightly more serious BLACK DYNAMITE!

#2 - Zombie Apocalypse

Bring on the undead! While THE EXPENDABLES have certainly faced off against cannon fodder in three movies, why not take any sympathy out and make them face an army of zombies! Up the gore but keep the one-liners. The series is already completely unrealistic, so take it over the edge and give us the most brutal and blood-soaked zombie scene since Peter Jackson's DEAD-ALIVE!

#1 - Martial Arts Tournament

With the background many of these actors have in martial arts and hand to hand combat fight scenes, why not have them all dropped on a mysterious island and force them to face off against one another, ENTER THE DRAGON style? These guys are buddies, but it would give an opportunity for Jet Li to fight Jason Statham again, a rematch between Dolph and Stallone, and even a chance for Van Damme to kick ass against one of the various MMA fighters in the cast. We all want to see a new BLOODSPORT and this would be an awesome way to do it.

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11:49AM on 08/15/2014
Maybe this article would be better titled "Top 10 Expendables-type genre movies we want to see".
Maybe this article would be better titled "Top 10 Expendables-type genre movies we want to see".
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+0
11:43AM on 08/15/2014
The zombie apocalypse? In space? These are not spin offs (or mostly even good ideas), they are just [link] casting. I'd be interested in expanding the expendables universe (expendables expanded...there you go), like with an Eastern version. But I'm interested in real spin-offs, like what this article suggested. I'd like to watch how Sly, Arnold, and Bruce (and I guess Mel...and JCVD? I can't remember) got together. I'd like to watch that prequel with them starting small, realizing they
The zombie apocalypse? In space? These are not spin offs (or mostly even good ideas), they are just [link] casting. I'd be interested in expanding the expendables universe (expendables expanded...there you go), like with an Eastern version. But I'm interested in real spin-offs, like what this article suggested. I'd like to watch how Sly, Arnold, and Bruce (and I guess Mel...and JCVD? I can't remember) got together. I'd like to watch that prequel with them starting small, realizing they have to be mercs, or like an x force thing. And then just spin offs to the other characters to know how they got together. I guess a sly and Statham movie or something. Team ups. But I know that'd prolly get old
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8:31AM on 08/15/2014
I want to see Michael Bay and Roland Emmerich challenging each other to a destruction-off.
I want to see Michael Bay and Roland Emmerich challenging each other to a destruction-off.
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8:26AM on 08/15/2014
I for one would love to see a Former Child Star Battle Royale.
I for one would love to see a Former Child Star Battle Royale.
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8:20AM on 08/15/2014
And a Samuel L. Jackson cameo is practically a given.
And a Samuel L. Jackson cameo is practically a given.
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8:19AM on 08/15/2014
WWE Films could make a killing from this. Better than having Triple H play babysitter, I'll give you that.
WWE Films could make a killing from this. Better than having Triple H play babysitter, I'll give you that.
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8:18AM on 08/15/2014
Basically Aliens, but with older people. That I would like to see.
Basically Aliens, but with older people. That I would like to see.
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8:18AM on 08/15/2014
Tropic Thunder was explosive and ambitious and I hope more comedies in that vein get made.
Tropic Thunder was explosive and ambitious and I hope more comedies in that vein get made.
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8:17AM on 08/15/2014
This here is a great idea. Michelle Yeoh, Zhang Ziyi and Andy Lau should be in it too. You could also mix things up with Indonesian and Thai action stars like Iko Uwais and Tony Jaa.
This here is a great idea. Michelle Yeoh, Zhang Ziyi and Andy Lau should be in it too. You could also mix things up with Indonesian and Thai action stars like Iko Uwais and Tony Jaa.
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8:16AM on 08/15/2014
I think there's potential in a whole film being based around the corny awesomeness showcased in the ending of Battleship. Not a great movie, but that part was cool.
I think there's potential in a whole film being based around the corny awesomeness showcased in the ending of Battleship. Not a great movie, but that part was cool.
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8:15AM on 08/15/2014
The head of the agency is F Murray Abraham. Robert Loggia is the villain.
The head of the agency is F Murray Abraham. Robert Loggia is the villain.
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