Top 10 Movies that Almost Made me Cry

I once walked in on my wife after she just finished watching THE HORSE WHISPERER. It looked like someone had emptied a can of pepper spray in her face and built a new coffee table made of Kleenex. I don't know what it is but I just don't cry over movies. I'm not going out of my way to stop myself either. The emotion is there, I feel the tears build up, and then...... nothing. My wife blames it on a black heart and lack of soul. Now that I have a son it's only a matter of time before I watch some father-son cheesiness and break down like a blubbering ass. Until then let's re-visit the scenes below and see if I can make it through again.


I'm not going to lie - if I wasn't at work when I watched this, I would have broken down at the end. Seeing all the real survivors pay tribute to Oskar's tomb punched me in the stomach so hard I had to take a bathroom pass to get myself together. I think I'd rather lose an arm than let a building full of fat and socially deprived factory workers see me cry on the job. Someone would try to be funny, I'd smash their face into the side of a van, the company would fire me. Sometimes it's better to hold it in.

2. THE GREEN MILE (1999)

Just before John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan) fries they show Dean (Barry Pepper) standing on the side, absolutely losing his grip. That coupled with Paul's (Tom Hanks) out of the ordinary handshake before he gives the signal made it a real close call for me. I didn't have any tissue though so I stood my ground. I probably cried my balls off in the shower later that night but that doesn't count.

3. BRAVEHEART (1995)

The ending of this film is so hard to watch for me. Seeing William Wallace (Mel Gibson) laying on the wooden slab having nuts chopped of is enough to make any man teary. The fact that he never gives up is the part that gets to me though. Struggling to get that final scream of "Freedom!" out fills my arms with goosebumps and challenges every tear-duct I have.

4. E.T. (1982)

I was 8 years old when I first saw this. How is it possible that I didn't cry? Maybe I was happy for the little guy. No more getting dressed up as an old lady and hiding in the closet. No more getting drunk and sick from Reese's Pieces. No more being left in the forest to die. He finally gets to go home and sleep in his own bed.

5. RUDY (1993)

I was fine when Rudy (Sean Astin) finally got on the field. Still dry-eyed when the fans started cheering his name. Kind of cracked when he tackled the quarterback. But when they showed Fortune (Charles S. Dutton) slam his hands together in a fit of proud rage and walk away from the field with the strut of a pimp getting paid, I almost lost it. Almost.


Wow, I almost cried a lot in '98. As Private Ryan (Harrison Young) pays a personal tribute to Captain Miller (Tom Hanks) with generations of his family watching in the distance, you can't help but get glassy-eyed. Seeing old dudes cry is bad enough but knowing 6 of the 7 people to the left of that picture above wouldn't exist without the courage of the man under that cross hits a section of the heart reserved for heroes.

7. THE NOTEBOOK (2004)

Watching Duke (James Garner) finally getting Allie (Gena Rowlands) to remember the greatest moments of their long life together was heart-warming. Watching Allie forget it all again 3 minutes later was devastating. I get upset if my wife forgets what I like on pizza. Something like this would destroy me.

8. MY DOG SKIP (2000)

Speaking of dogs, I still don't how I made it through this movie without breaking down. When I was 11 we moved into an apartment and had to give our family dog, Peppy, to the Humane Society. I cried for a week. SKIP hit that emotional nail right on the head and drove it deep into the hearts of dog lovers everywhere. Lately I've been noticing how old our current dog is getting and I............. Forget it, I don't don't want to talk about it. There's something in my eye.

9. DEEP IMPACT (1998)

I re-watched the scene above to get the screencap and almost lost it again, especially now that I have my own little boy. Not only does Oren (Ron Eldard) have about 20 seconds to meet his son for the first time before he blows up and saves the planet - but he's been blinded earlier in the film and can't actually see his wife and child for the last time. Why didn't the director show someone shooting his dog in the face in the background to make sure shit couldn't get any sadder?

10. THE TRUMAN SHOW (1998)

This one really caught me off guard in the theatre. I went to see Jim Carrey talk out of his ass and ended up an emotional wreck by the end, hoping Truman would escape the confines of his real life. I love this film more than most people but seeing Carrey be serious for the first time in his life couldn't justify tears.

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