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McG wins world's stupidest battle to direct the Ouija Board movie

01.05.2011

A while back we reported that for some reason, there was a fierce contest with two misguided directors desperately competing for the right to make a movie about the lame board game/celestial object, the Ouija Board.

Both submitted pitches, and McG's vision won out over Breck Eisner, aided by his script crafted by TRON LEGACY's Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz. Because we all know the best part of TRON LEGACY was the story...

Exact plot details remain a mystery, though the project is currently being described as "a four-quadrant supernatural adventure centering around a family, with influences from The Mummy and Indiana Jones ." What, no influences from JUMANJI, the current title holder for "best board game inspired movie?" Or did the movie come first? I forget.

Anyway, at least McG isn't going to mangle a franchise we care about like TERMINATOR, so beat the hell out of OUIJA all you want. I do however feel my hands sliding toward "S," now "U," now "C," before coming to a rest at "K."

Extra Tidbit: The Ouija Board catching on fire was the dumbest part of PARANORMAL ACTIVITY.
Source: Heat Vision

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-1
12:27AM on 01/07/2011

They already made this movie, it was called Witchboard.

There were also sequels:
Witchboard 2: Witchboardier
Witchboard With A Vengeance
and of course...
Live Free or Witchboard
There were also sequels:
Witchboard 2: Witchboardier
Witchboard With A Vengeance
and of course...
Live Free or Witchboard
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11:45PM on 01/06/2011

Nice.

The title of this article is most likely better than the film will be.
The title of this article is most likely better than the film will be.
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10:26PM on 01/06/2011
Yes, this movie will suck balls! However, I am not here to disucss that- "Jumanji" may be about a boardgame, but it's not based on one. Also, freaking "Clue: The Movie" is the best board game based movie.
Yes, this movie will suck balls! However, I am not here to disucss that- "Jumanji" may be about a boardgame, but it's not based on one. Also, freaking "Clue: The Movie" is the best board game based movie.
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7:27PM on 01/06/2011
What else? Candle the film?
What else? Candle the film?
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+1
9:47AM on 01/06/2011

JUMANJI

the jumanji movie was based on a children's book about a fictional board game.
the jumanji movie was based on a children's book about a fictional board game.
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+0
4:17AM on 01/06/2011
What's next, Connect Four the movie?
What's next, Connect Four the movie?
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+1
11:18PM on 01/05/2011
And I'll take the old-school witch board over this anyday.
And I'll take the old-school witch board over this anyday.
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+4
11:16PM on 01/05/2011

i've said this before...but...

...if you think MCG's films suck...you should know his family. I have the shitty pleasure of doing business with his dad sometimes, and he may be the most pompous asshole on my client list. I firmly believe the apple does not fall far from the tree.
...if you think MCG's films suck...you should know his family. I have the shitty pleasure of doing business with his dad sometimes, and he may be the most pompous asshole on my client list. I firmly believe the apple does not fall far from the tree.
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10:34PM on 01/05/2011
At least the people who take Ouija boards seriously in real life will probably stop taking them serious after this stupid movie.
At least the people who take Ouija boards seriously in real life will probably stop taking them serious after this stupid movie.
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7:52PM on 01/05/2011
Why?
Why?
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-1
7:52PM on 01/05/2011

He's no Fincher

McG can't just take a brand name item and turn it into presumably 90 minutes. The one thing I can say though is thank goodness Shyamalan's name isn't near this one.
McG can't just take a brand name item and turn it into presumably 90 minutes. The one thing I can say though is thank goodness Shyamalan's name isn't near this one.
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7:36PM on 01/05/2011
Next thing you know we will have "8 Ball the Movie".
Next thing you know we will have "8 Ball the Movie".
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7:53PM on 01/05/2011
Im Fairly Certain They Are Making An "Magic 8Ball" Movie. Will Either Of These Movies Be Any Good? "Outlook Not So Good"...
Im Fairly Certain They Are Making An "Magic 8Ball" Movie. Will Either Of These Movies Be Any Good? "Outlook Not So Good"...
7:36PM on 01/05/2011
Next thing you know we will have "8 Ball the Movie".
Next thing you know we will have "8 Ball the Movie".
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7:32PM on 01/05/2011
This could probably be a good movie...with a different director....different subject matter...different name.....:)
This could probably be a good movie...with a different director....different subject matter...different name.....:)
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7:26PM on 01/05/2011
I probably could direct this and it would be a blockbuster. Hahaha
I probably could direct this and it would be a blockbuster. Hahaha
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7:07PM on 01/05/2011
Maybe because they're making a movie about the Ouija board it'll be like one of those movie curses and everyone involved will cease to have a career afterwords. Is that too much wishful thinking?
Maybe because they're making a movie about the Ouija board it'll be like one of those movie curses and everyone involved will cease to have a career afterwords. Is that too much wishful thinking?
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+6
6:50PM on 01/05/2011

Ahh, Jumanji...

Hang on, why did they never bring out an actual Jumanji board game tie-in? Were the merchandisers at the time retarded?
Hang on, why did they never bring out an actual Jumanji board game tie-in? Were the merchandisers at the time retarded?
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8:28AM on 01/06/2011
Milton Bradley released one. [link]
Milton Bradley released one. [link]
6:49PM on 01/05/2011

Extra Tidbit

Wrong again.

The dumbest part of Paranormal Activity was me. For letting my girlfriend drag me to it.
Wrong again.

The dumbest part of Paranormal Activity was me. For letting my girlfriend drag me to it.
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6:41PM on 01/05/2011

Extra Tidbit

Wrong.

I thought the dumbest part was how Micah kept pissing the ghost off by giving it more attention by filming the encounters every night. Even though the guy they called to help them said NOT to do that.
Wrong.

I thought the dumbest part was how Micah kept pissing the ghost off by giving it more attention by filming the encounters every night. Even though the guy they called to help them said NOT to do that.
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+11
6:30PM on 01/05/2011
remember when everyone said "a FACEBOOK movie?!?! you have to be kidding me!!" and then it turned out great... This will be nothing like that.
remember when everyone said "a FACEBOOK movie?!?! you have to be kidding me!!" and then it turned out great... This will be nothing like that.
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5:07PM on 01/05/2011

Why so glum?

This is a perfect marrying of director and material people! Ouija is a project that's been out there for a while. No rhyme or reason to it, but it's there. And McG is a director who has succeeded in crafting bad-to-OK movies, and has a large following of haters. So isn't it fitting? So while other, GOOD directors are out trying to make something that doesn't at least suck, he's there working on a movie that shouldn't exist in the first place.

Oh, and about Jumanji. The book came first. I
This is a perfect marrying of director and material people! Ouija is a project that's been out there for a while. No rhyme or reason to it, but it's there. And McG is a director who has succeeded in crafting bad-to-OK movies, and has a large following of haters. So isn't it fitting? So while other, GOOD directors are out trying to make something that doesn't at least suck, he's there working on a movie that shouldn't exist in the first place.

Oh, and about Jumanji. The book came first. I didn't know they made a board game of it.
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4:51PM on 01/05/2011
Oh great spirits, help me choose a pun. McOuija or Ouija Bored?
Oh great spirits, help me choose a pun. McOuija or Ouija Bored?
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4:44PM on 01/05/2011
I just asked the spirits about this movie and they said the following on my ouija board: T-H-I-S M-O-V-I-E W-I-L-L S-U-C-K B-A-L-L-S
I just asked the spirits about this movie and they said the following on my ouija board: T-H-I-S M-O-V-I-E W-I-L-L S-U-C-K B-A-L-L-S
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4:37PM on 01/05/2011
Initially... I thought this was gonna be some kid horror movie—average, corny, but doable. I never liked the idea, but I never hated it. It was just something that was going to happen, and it made no difference to me.

What it's turned into, I don't even have words for.
Initially... I thought this was gonna be some kid horror movie—average, corny, but doable. I never liked the idea, but I never hated it. It was just something that was going to happen, and it made no difference to me.

What it's turned into, I don't even have words for.
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4:16PM on 01/05/2011

the social network

Now I am sure this movie is going to fail miserably and the story is going to sick balls, but I kind of remember, the shit "the facebook" movie was getting before it came out ( or atleast before the "creep" trailer came out), but then again this movie doesn't have an amazing director or screen writer so I guess digress.
Now I am sure this movie is going to fail miserably and the story is going to sick balls, but I kind of remember, the shit "the facebook" movie was getting before it came out ( or atleast before the "creep" trailer came out), but then again this movie doesn't have an amazing director or screen writer so I guess digress.
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4:12PM on 01/05/2011

What shit is this?

I really hope that McG uses the thing and dies of a heart attack. beside 'we are marshall' everything he has touched is complete shit. this just might be the project we need to get rid of this fucker. Granted Bale is a Prima Donna, but in the right hands the movie will be gold, how could you fuck up a terminator movie?
I really hope that McG uses the thing and dies of a heart attack. beside 'we are marshall' everything he has touched is complete shit. this just might be the project we need to get rid of this fucker. Granted Bale is a Prima Donna, but in the right hands the movie will be gold, how could you fuck up a terminator movie?
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+3
4:00PM on 01/05/2011

PD + McG

Platinum Dunes is producing and McG is directing? Now don't get too excited but this could actually be the worst movie ever made. I see Platinum Dunes has finally ran out of remakes to rape. Anyway I hope this thing bombs horrible and scares those hacks known as Platinum Dunes away from Monster Squad.
Platinum Dunes is producing and McG is directing? Now don't get too excited but this could actually be the worst movie ever made. I see Platinum Dunes has finally ran out of remakes to rape. Anyway I hope this thing bombs horrible and scares those hacks known as Platinum Dunes away from Monster Squad.
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+4
3:53PM on 01/05/2011

The story should be...

...about a young boy who wants to win the school spelling bee, but then he dies in some tragic accident. His best friend then contacts him via the Ouija board and manages to enter his spirit in the spelling bee.

Also, there should be a dead uncle that gives the kid advice through a Boggle game.
...about a young boy who wants to win the school spelling bee, but then he dies in some tragic accident. His best friend then contacts him via the Ouija board and manages to enter his spirit in the spelling bee.

Also, there should be a dead uncle that gives the kid advice through a Boggle game.
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3:37PM on 01/05/2011

Congrats McG for the easy paycheck

unfortunately, people will pay to see this crap and that will spawn a franchise with Ouija 2: the board strikes back and Ouija 3: return on the board. hope i didn't give McG any ideas, if I did, pay me.
unfortunately, people will pay to see this crap and that will spawn a franchise with Ouija 2: the board strikes back and Ouija 3: return on the board. hope i didn't give McG any ideas, if I did, pay me.
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3:31PM on 01/05/2011
It amazes me what studios will blow $ on,in this,the worst of economic times.
It amazes me what studios will blow $ on,in this,the worst of economic times.
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3:04PM on 01/05/2011
The movie is going to bank and bank hard.
The movie is going to bank and bank hard.
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+8
2:47PM on 01/05/2011
another piece of crap hollywood regurgitates
another piece of crap hollywood regurgitates
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+12
2:26PM on 01/05/2011

Perfect!

A director no one cares about, doing a movie no one cares about!
A director no one cares about, doing a movie no one cares about!
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