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Of course Chris Rock is remaking an Akira Kurosawa movie

04.13.2010

What the hell is the deal with Chris Rock? The man has some of the most brilliant stand-up I've ever seen, but nearly all his movies are awful, and he's constantly doing Chris Rock-ified versions of classics that no one ever thought should be remade, especially by him.

I THINK I LOVE MY WIFE was a remake of L’AMOUR L’APRES-MIDI, DOWN TO EARTH was another go at HEAVEN CAN WAIT and now DEATH AT A FUNERAL is a remake of the British DEATH AT A FUNERAL from a few years ago, with both films starring Peter Dinklage.

Now he’s at it again, as in an interview with Black Voices, he says he’s remaking Akira Kurosawa’s HIGH AND LOW with director Mike Nichols, stepping in for screenwriter David Mamet. Here’s the plot:

Based loosely on Evan Hunter’s ‘King’s Ransom,’ the story follows an executive named Kingo Gondo, who learns that his son has been kidnapped. He is prepared to pay the ransom amount until he discovers that the kidnappers mistakenly abducted the child of his chauffeur. Gondo must decide between keeping the money he has saved up for a critical corporate buyout or using it to save his driver’s son.

So uh, is this a comedy now with Rock involved? Kurosawa’s film was a classic crime thriller, so what the hell is Chris Rock doing anywhere near a remake of this, even if he's not starring (which good lord, he could be)? Why not just have Tracy Morgan re-shoot REAR WINDOW while we’re here, or Steve Carell pen a CHINATOWN reboot?

Extra Tidbit: "Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them." - Chris Rock

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2:19PM on 04/14/2010

Well you know...I'm just sayin'.

He's black, therefore he steals...er rather "borrows"...like that bike you forgot to lock up just that 'One' time outside your house...yeah, you know which one I'm talking about the one your sister used to ride and you'd sniff the seat like it's was coated with magical uncut Columbian coke. Yum. Pennies.
He's black, therefore he steals...er rather "borrows"...like that bike you forgot to lock up just that 'One' time outside your house...yeah, you know which one I'm talking about the one your sister used to ride and you'd sniff the seat like it's was coated with magical uncut Columbian coke. Yum. Pennies.
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2:00PM on 04/14/2010

LEFT N**GA'! LEFT!

Chris needs to stick to stand up and New Jack City remakes. He was great as Pookie!
Chris needs to stick to stand up and New Jack City remakes. He was great as Pookie!
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11:23AM on 04/14/2010

HAHAHA!

I know you were joking, but I think a Tracy Morgan remake of Rear Window would be fucking hilarious.
I know you were joking, but I think a Tracy Morgan remake of Rear Window would be fucking hilarious.
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8:50PM on 04/13/2010

Let me say this

If they did it for Sandler, If they did it for Murray, if they did it for Murphy, for Eddie Murphy, They can certainly do it for Rock. But not Dane Cook, he will always suck
If they did it for Sandler, If they did it for Murray, if they did it for Murphy, for Eddie Murphy, They can certainly do it for Rock. But not Dane Cook, he will always suck
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5:29PM on 04/13/2010
This could work. A millionaire played by Chris Rock has a party to celebrate his son's great year at boarding school while tracey morgan, the limo driver takes his son a spoiled dropout to the same party. Everyone parties heavy and passes out. In come two bumbling small time thieves with a boss played by denis leary who wants to help another company ruin the millionaire's company. Unfortunately the crooks bungle it up kidnapping the brat instead of the rich kid. When the millionaire discovers
This could work. A millionaire played by Chris Rock has a party to celebrate his son's great year at boarding school while tracey morgan, the limo driver takes his son a spoiled dropout to the same party. Everyone parties heavy and passes out. In come two bumbling small time thieves with a boss played by denis leary who wants to help another company ruin the millionaire's company. Unfortunately the crooks bungle it up kidnapping the brat instead of the rich kid. When the millionaire discovers the wrong kid was abducted he wants to get the kid back for publicity but the limo driver does not. Add in a paranoid cop played by Bruce willis and super hot reporter and you got all the makings of a good kidnapping parody film.
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3:55PM on 04/13/2010

Sulaco

A good movie starring Chris Rock as the main star does not exist...yet.
A good movie starring Chris Rock as the main star does not exist...yet.
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-1
3:40PM on 04/13/2010

I dare you...

Name one good movie Chris Rock was the leading man in. Not an ensemble piece, just a movie with Rock as the main star.
Name one good movie Chris Rock was the leading man in. Not an ensemble piece, just a movie with Rock as the main star.
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3:59PM on 04/13/2010
CB4
CB4
10:40PM on 04/13/2010
Hell yeah CB4!!
Hell yeah CB4!!
3:00PM on 04/13/2010
Chris Rock has some bad movies, and has some good movies, but I don't think he is ever the reason that movies are bad.
Chris Rock has some bad movies, and has some good movies, but I don't think he is ever the reason that movies are bad.
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2:46PM on 04/13/2010
I've been meaning to catch Kurosawa's movie for some time now. That man knew how to make movies like few others.

While I don't care much for the majority of Chris Rock's movies, the completely bizarre thing of him remaking a Kurosawa crime drama from fifty years ago doesn't sound like the worse thing in the world simply because of that. If he were remaking something like Rashomon, a truly landmark film. Or for that matter something along the lines of Breathless or 8 1/2, name-recognition
I've been meaning to catch Kurosawa's movie for some time now. That man knew how to make movies like few others.

While I don't care much for the majority of Chris Rock's movies, the completely bizarre thing of him remaking a Kurosawa crime drama from fifty years ago doesn't sound like the worse thing in the world simply because of that. If he were remaking something like Rashomon, a truly landmark film. Or for that matter something along the lines of Breathless or 8 1/2, name-recognition alone would doom the projects. But I don't think Kurosawa's film noir work is as cherished by the masses as the medieval samurai westerns he made. And with fifty years between movies, and Rock's involvement, it's any guess what this will be like.
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2:36PM on 04/13/2010
A Blaffair to Rememblack
A Blaffair to Rememblack
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1:56PM on 04/13/2010

First of all

the idea of Tracy Morgan in a Rear Window remake is actually hilarious. But regarding Rock, he is a very smart guy. One of the best stand-up comics ever. His movies however do tend to suck. Aside from New Jack City, and CB4, which were decades ago, most of his flicks are pretty bad. But I'm always willing to give his films a chance, because his stand up is so damn good. I'm thinking this High and Low remake has to be a comedy, but then again maybe not. His dramatic role in New Jack City is
the idea of Tracy Morgan in a Rear Window remake is actually hilarious. But regarding Rock, he is a very smart guy. One of the best stand-up comics ever. His movies however do tend to suck. Aside from New Jack City, and CB4, which were decades ago, most of his flicks are pretty bad. But I'm always willing to give his films a chance, because his stand up is so damn good. I'm thinking this High and Low remake has to be a comedy, but then again maybe not. His dramatic role in New Jack City is flawless. And he was pretty damn good along side Morgan Freeman in Nurse Betty. All I'm saying is...LET CHRIS ROCK DO HIS THING. Which is whatever the hell he wants.
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1:35PM on 04/13/2010
This is going to be a comedy and yet another classic Chris Rock piece of crap. I could be wrong, but... no I doubt I am.
This is going to be a comedy and yet another classic Chris Rock piece of crap. I could be wrong, but... no I doubt I am.
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1:27PM on 04/13/2010
Wait a minute. Who cares if Chris Rock is involved ? Mike Nichols is directing, and David Mamet is writing (Im guessing since he was at one point going to direct, he must have wrote it)
Thats a pretty damn good team. Nichols shoots dialogue like no one and Mamet write them like no one.

EDIT: When I read it it sounded like Mike Nichols was stepping in for David Mamet as a director, not Chris Rock stepping in as a screenwriter. My bad.
Wait a minute. Who cares if Chris Rock is involved ? Mike Nichols is directing, and David Mamet is writing (Im guessing since he was at one point going to direct, he must have wrote it)
Thats a pretty damn good team. Nichols shoots dialogue like no one and Mamet write them like no one.

EDIT: When I read it it sounded like Mike Nichols was stepping in for David Mamet as a director, not Chris Rock stepping in as a screenwriter. My bad.
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1:33PM on 04/13/2010
Rock is stepping in for Mamet as screenwriter. Mamet's script was close to ten years old and was written for Scorcese. It's being scrapped and Rock is re-doing it. Hence the anguish.
Rock is stepping in for Mamet as screenwriter. Mamet's script was close to ten years old and was written for Scorcese. It's being scrapped and Rock is re-doing it. Hence the anguish.
1:39PM on 04/13/2010
Thumbs down for me.
Thumbs down for me.
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