Summit reaching out to Oscar-caliber directors for Breaking Dawn

Not content with making hundreds of millions of dollars and hypnotizing the majority of teenage girls and their moms across the country, Summit is going for something you wouldn’t expect with the final two films in the Twilight saga: critical acclaim.

I know, I know, stop laughing. But seriously, EW is reporting that Summit is reaching out to A-list directors Sofia Coppola (LOST IN TRANSLATION), Gus Van Sant (MILK) and Bill Condon (DREAMGIRLS) to direct the final two installments of the series.

For those of you who forgot, this is the book where SPOILERS Edward gives Bella a cesarean with his TEETH and then Jacob the werewolf falls in love with her baby. Surely, a plot that would attract ANY respectable director.

Van Sant confirmed he’d been approached, but the other two declined comment. Condon is a pretty strange choice, Coppola is a possibility, seeing as she’s covered teen angst in THE VIRGIN SUICIDES. I can’t see any possible reason Van Sant would have to want to be involved with this, but who knows, maybe he’s tired of making good movies.

Just sign someone, film and release this shit so I can stop reporting about it sometime within the next decade.