Movie Jail: This week's defendant is...Adam Sandler!
Jul. 3, 2012
The Defendant
Adam Sandler
The Case
The Prosecution: Click, Spanglish, Eight Crazy Nights, Bedtime Stories, The Longest Yard, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, Just Go With It, Jack & Jill.*
When is enough, enough? Though Sandler’s movies consistently gross over $50M a picture (exceptions are some of his dramatic turns in Reign Over Me, Punch Drunk Love and Spanglish), and close to half grossing over $100M worldwide, the quality of this output is just as consistent….in awfulness. His highest critically rated movies on Rotten Tomatoes are Punch Drunk Love, Funny People, Stupidity and The Wedding Singer. While most are officially “rotten” on the site, the same holds true for the audience rating. And though the court retains the fact that the movies are financially successful, the court fails to receive any evidence that anyone likes these pieces of shitballs.....of shit.
The Defense: Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, The Waterboy, Punch Drunk Love amongst others, comedy CDs “They’re All Gonna Laugh At You” and “What the Hell Happened to Me” as well as his skits on Saturday Night Live and cameos in a handful of other movies like Dirty Work and Coneheads*
*The court recognizes that all movies are subjective, so relax.
Sandler showed up big in his first couple headlining gigs with Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore, widely considered to be his funniest roles and “classics” for a generation. He parlayed that success into other successful comedies including The Waterboy, The Wedding Singer and Big Daddy. Some proved to be more financially successful than others, but the fact is that Sandler made the mid and late 90s his bitch, and made Happy Madison Productions a money making factory.
IN CLOSING...
So, what’s to be done with Mr. Sandler? Could his earlier successful movies give a pass to the more recent, water downed version of the man? Does his box office appeal have any bearing in this case? And the most important question to be asked, once all evidence is taken into consideration, I ask you The Jury, is Adam Sandler GUILTY or NOT GUILTY? Let’s hear YOUR arguments, either side, by STRIKING BACK BELOW.
| Extra Tidbit: | The verdict and sentence for this week's Movie Jail trial will be announced in the next column, along with our most recent defendant. Who else deserves their ass thrown in Movie Jail? Strike back below and we might throw his/her ass on trial! |
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| Source: | JoBlo.com |
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Guilty
Guilty
Guilty
Guility
Next up: Tyler Perry.
Next up: Tyler Perry.
Guilty
Guilty
Guilty
As for next week, how about M. Night. Another guy that started off great and just went downhill ever since.
As for next week, how about M. Night. Another guy that started off great and just went downhill ever since.
GUILTY
The guy on Undeclared said it best, when he said Billy Madison was like punk rock, everything after that, meh.(I don't count Punch Drunk Love, cause that was not a film set up by Sandler himself)
The guy on Undeclared said it best, when he said Billy Madison was like punk rock, everything after that, meh.(I don't count Punch Drunk Love, cause that was not a film set up by Sandler himself)
Beyond redemption
Or he may get off with a warning.
Or he may get off with a warning.
Throw the book at him!
Guilty
Not Guilty
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double post
Guilty as hell
Though to be honest, he should have gotten the death penalty for Jack and Jill.
Though to be honest, he should have gotten the death penalty for Jack and Jill.
GUILTY!!!
Sentence: Solitary confinement with nothing to watch but his own bad movies for 1 month. Maybe if he sees how many of his movies suck he may learn to pick better movie choices next time.
Sentence: Solitary confinement with nothing to watch but his own bad movies for 1 month. Maybe if he sees how many of his movies suck he may learn to pick better movie choices next time.
Not Guilty
Sentence: Solitary confinement with nothing to watch but his own bad movies for 1 month. Maybe if he sees how many of his movies suck he may learn to pick better movie choices next time.
Sentence: Solitary confinement with nothing to watch but his own bad movies for 1 month. Maybe if he sees how many of his movies suck he may learn to pick better movie choices next time.
GUILTY!
As for who should stand trial next, I suppose it would be too obvious to choose Michael Bay. But screw it. I call Michael Bay to
As for who should stand trial next, I suppose it would be too obvious to choose Michael Bay. But screw it. I call Michael Bay to the stand!
Guilty
!
GUILTY
Guilty
GUILTY
GUILTY!
Guilty as chargecd
Further evidence for the prosecution: Happy Madison Productions also brought us Rob Schneider crapfests like The Animal, Deuce Bigalow and The Hot Chick. HG also gave us David Spade in Joe Dirt and Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star.
Further evidence for the prosecution: Happy Madison Productions also brought us Rob Schneider crapfests like The Animal, Deuce Bigalow and The Hot Chick. HG also gave us David Spade in Joe Dirt and Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star.
Not Guilty
GUILTY
guilty
GUILTY
Guilty
Guilty...
He is Innocent