"I'm just sick of all the amateur stuff. You know? I mean, like, if I'm paying top dollar, I want a little production value. You know? Like some editing, transition, something. Some music." "Yeah, you know, well, I'm sorry, Evan, that the Coen brothers don't direct porn that I watch. They're hard to get ahold of. Okay?"
"Now lookit... When you go up to talk to her man, I don't want you be the guy in the PG13 movie everybody's really hopping makes it happen ....I want you to be like the guy in the rated R movie, you know, the guy your not sure whether or not you like yet. You're not sure where he's coming from alright. You're a bad man. You're a bad man. You're a bad man."
"Excuse me darlin' I'm sorry wow, I want you to remember this face here. Ok, this is the guy behind the guy behind the guy." "Would you cut that shit out?" "What, she smiled." "It's not cool man." "Did she or did she not smile?" "It doesn't matter." "Mike I'm tellin' ya, girls love that stuff." "You're gonna screw up our plan." "Baby were gonna get laid."