I've always been an avowed fan of freaky chicks. And this week's lady, while having faded into the Hollywood background in the new millennium, certainly made her mark by letting her freak flag fly. From being the previous owner of an occult shop to giving off a vibe that she might eat your head, you have to admit there's a heavy batch of something weird when you're dealing with: FAIRUZA BALK!

ASS (8/10):

Balk's backside is nothing to, well, balk at (heh, heh). While her overall vibe may leave you more concerned for the safety of your nuts than the quality of her body, as you can see from the picture below (no that's not a nipple, I blurred that out) it's obvious that she's got a keister that inspires you to partake in exactly the sort of activity her pose is meant to inspire. She may have been an epic fail as a person in THE CRAFT but the butt gets high marks.

BOOBIES (8/10):

It's a shame that Fairuza really only showed these off in their glory in AMERICAN HISTORY X because she is splendidly arrayed in her upper girl parts. And that movie is not one where you get to enjoy the fact. While she tends to do the goth girl coverup of her tasty bits, when she does give us a glimpse of what she's got going on the evidence speaks to supple, bouncy and downright tasty.

FACE (8/10):

Personally I think FB is beautiful. You may be put off that she looks extremely likely to go all praying mantis on you after making the sweet sweet love, but I'm much more interested in faces like this than the typical flavor of the week. There's no doubt that her look has more of an edge than even the "edgy" actresses in Hollywood. But for that I say thank you. You can take your Dushku's and Fox's, I'll take me some Balk any day of the week.

PERSONALITY (8/10):

One of the things I typically hate about so-called dark chicks is that they seem so intent on proving just how dark and serious they really are. This fair lady does not suffer from that need. When you see her interviewed she kind of comes across as Goth!, rather than goth. She's enthusiastic, well-spoken, thinks it's funny that people are still hung up on her collecting knives when she was fifteen, and seems to have a strong sense of self. Basically, she's way too cool for most of us but has the good grace not to shove it in our face. I don't know if Satan's got cheerleaders, but if he does, I'd guess FB could be captain.

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