C'mon Hollywood TAGS

C'mon Hollywood: Don't screw up the Spawn reboot!

When I was growing up as an awkward Goth kid (instead of the highly secure Goth adult I am today), I obviously gravitated towards “darker” and “edgier” heroes like Batman, The Punisher, and of course – the patron saint of grimdark edgelords – Spawn . Hell, I’m still a fan of Spawn, and even have a soft spot for the ’97 feature film...
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10.10.2017
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Címon Hollywood: Take more chances on those Star Wars spin-offs!

Is it just me, or does it seem Disney  has been shoving STAR WARS down our throats lately? They’re all like, “ Hey kids! Do you like STAR WARS? Can’t get enough of it, right? No? Well, fuck you , you’re getting all the STAR WARS anyway, you dumb piece of shit! Don’t like it? There’s nothing you can do about it! STAR WARS shall rule all!!!...
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09.12.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Make Sandman into a TV show already!

THE SANDMAN is one of the seminal comic-book stories of all time. Written by Neil Gaiman , the series - about the adventures of Morpheus, the eponymous "Sandman" and personification of "Dreams" - explored the deep intricacies of mythology, themes of love and loss, and the art of storytelling itself. And through it all, it’s also full of great,...
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08.17.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Where are all the cool opening credits sequences?

I can recall the first time I saw a movie without an opening credits scene. It was MUMMY RETURNS . I remember being distracted during the whole Scorpion King prologue, because I was thinking…wait…where are the opening credits? Afterwards, I thought I just imagined it wasn’t there. But, nope, after seeing it a few times more, I found out it was true: the movie...
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07.18.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Film vs. Digital

DC vs. Marvel. Sega vs. Nintendo. Betty vs. Veronica. RC Cola vs. Tab. We can now put “film vs. digital” within the pantheon of great debates that will lead people to lose friends, get into fisticuffs, and lead to murder (presumably). See, movies as an artform are in a transitional period right now. Essentially, shooting on film is being replaced, slowly but surely, by...
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06.13.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why critics are important

While it’s lessened quite a bit over the years, there’s still this cultural image of a film critic as a bespectacled balding guy in a professor’s tweed jacket (the one’s with the darker colored fabric on the elbows for some reason), smoking a pipe, and talking about how shitty the latest TRANSFORMERS or MARVEL movies were. Just with more highfalutin language and...
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05.23.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why haven't you made a Twisted Metal movie yet?

As a kid, I remember popping TWISTED METAL 2 into my PS1, entering the code to play as Minion , and then going out of my way to destroy Paris and any fool who got in my way . It was good times. Honestly, while I’m not much of a gamer in general, I loved TWISTED METAL. It was fast-paced, intuitive, and – above all – fun . Even more importantly, like MORTAL KOMBAT and...
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05.02.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why CGI is not the problem with bad CGI in movies

I couldn’t have been the only one who watched JURASSIC WORLD last year, and noticed that the CGI somehow looked worse than JURASSIC PARK almost 25 years prior, right? I’m not going crazy? PLEASE TELL ME I’M NOT GOING CRAZY!!! And that’s not the only movie. I mean, we have POWER RANGERS, the new TRANSFORMERS, that JUSTICE LEAGUE trailer – all with shitty...
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04.18.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why blockbusters are just as "artful" as arthouse films

I’m aware that title is probably a bit more incendiary than I intended. Upfront I want to say I love arthouse films. Hell, HOLY MOUNTAIN, 8 1/2 , and CLERGYMAN AND THE SEASHELL are some of my favorite films of all time. What’s great about these types of films, is that they experiment and test the boundaries of what film is capable of. Sometimes this is accomplished through...
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03.21.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why Batman shouldn't kill

Who doesn’t love Batman? I mean, even ISIS loves Batman ! And why not? Batman is a badass avenger of the night who knows every martial arts ever, is super smart (he is the World’s Greatest Detective after all), and is also hella swole. What more do you need? Well, I’m glad you asked. You see, besides his sweet costume, gadgets, and such, what makes Batman...
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02.28.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Race and gender-bending are not ruining movies

Nick Fury. Starbuck. Deadshot. Nova Prime. These are all characters who were either race-bended, or gender-bended – terms meaning to change a fictional character (this will be important later) from one race or gender to another. While there is always a stink against this type of casting when initially announced (because the internet is awful), once the dust settles nobody gives...
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02.14.2017
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C'mon Hollywood: Why videogame movies suck and how to fix 'em

SUPER MARIO BROS. STREET FIGHTER. MORTAL KOMBAT ANNIHILATION. HOUSE OF THE DEAD. Not only are these terrible videogame movies, there are some of the worst movies, period . And the list goes on! DOUBLE DRAGON, DEAD OR ALIVE, ALONE IN DAR – I mean, you get the idea. Hell, let’s add ASSASSIN’S CREED and (presumably) RESIDENT EVIL: FINAL CHAPTER to that list as well. So...
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01.24.2017
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