Friend Request is the Myspace of horror films

Last Updated on August 2, 2021

Oof. So this one flew under the radar somehow, but better late than never I say! Because the world needs to be aware that shit like this exists. Moreover, that satire, irony, and all that is good in the world has been sucked away and we’re now living in a reality that is a husk of its former self, or – most likely – reality was always this meaningless and cruel and movies like FRIEND REQUEST help us pierce through our delusions and see the ugliness that surrounds us at all times. We’re living in a MadTV sketch – and not even a good one!

The worst part – more than the cheap production designs, perfunctory acting, and terrible effects – is that the film can’t even stick to its main conceit! It’s basically a goddamn witch movie with barely a connection to social media! That’d be like doing a report on Abraham Lincoln, and spending the whole time talking about JURASSIC PARK and only mentioning Lincoln in the intro and conclusion! That’s not how this works! Or at least not how it’s supposed to work! Again, meaning and purpose are lost concepts in a world that allowed THE EMOJI MOVIE and FRIEND REQUEST to exist in the same year! Hell, I’m almost positive this movie is the reason the hurricanes and fires are ravaging the country!

Meanwhile – if you care at all – FRIEND REQUEST will be messaging theaters September 22nd, far enough from Halloween so as not to compete with real horror films.