Reviews & Counting
# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Written by: The Arrow
Director: Billy O'Brien

John Lynch/Dan
Essie Davis/Orla
Marcel Iures/John
Sean Harris/Jamie
8 10
In a secluded farm in rural Ireland, some genius Doctor is mucking around with cow DNA in the name of making them reproduce faster. When things go awry, the cows give birth to a new, deadly and swiftly upping in numbers cow-species that likes to viciously munch on all living things. It’s up to rugged farm owner Dan (Lynch) and a couple of “in hiding” kids” to stop the plague of deadly burger meat from spreading beyond the farm.
Any movie that opens with a girl's arm up some cow’s “privates” has to be special. ISOLATION was one of those “don’t f*ck with Mother Nature, cause she’ll f*ck you right back ever harder” type of genre morality tale. It was also a lean and mean monster movie that whooped where it counted; frights and gore. I had never head of the film before fervently milking its teats and am so happy that I just discovered it for myself.

At first glance ISOLATION's story might seem silly-willy. The term Killer Cows From Outer Space might even pop into your noggin when reading the synopsis (it did mine) but trust me when I say this; it was NOT a campy movie and outer space had nothing to do with it. This genre vice-grip took itself mucho seriously and handled its plotline in a powerful/effective manner. The flick also sported solidly written lead characters, played by excellent actors at that! Them acting so rationally within the zany situation while feeling so genuine definitely jacked up the credibility and the intensity of the film.

Natch as to the execution of the situation. The flick masterfully kept its “full picture” in the dark, gradually given us inventive tidbits of twisted info as the clock ticked up, hence keeping me engrossed, dying to know more as to what the heck was going on. Every time I thought the story had blown its horror load, it would come back and prove me wrong with yet another badass revelation. Visually, you couldn’t ask for a better looking macabre treat. I could almost smell the manure from my seat (or was it that drunk dude sitting next to me) and got the chills many o times from the spooky surroundings. And man did those monsters kick that ass or what!!! Well designed, slimy, brrr inducing and relentless the beasties here got the motherf*cking job done in terms of dazzling me and scaring the shite out of me.

Any objections councilor? Just two your honor. May I proceed? YES! I personally would have liked to see more of the creatures. More often than none they’d zip by too fast (in the dark) for me to get a 100% clear shot. Lastly, the film was indeed far from original in terms of basic storyline (Its ALIEN with cows, specially its final act), but it executed it with such panache, skill and heart that I pretty much overlooked that, much like Hilary Clinton dismissed that BJ Bill got from that tramp. I mean its a movie about warped cow-offshoots running amuck! And it pulled it off! I bought it! That in itself was a feat!

Yup, ISOLATION was the real deal and I can’t recommend it enough! Visceral and pretty damn gruesome (wait till you see the "spike gun" at play), it took me through the horror spin cycle and I thanked it for it.  I actually learned stuff from the film too! Like you have to spin a baby cow around real fast if its not breathing (hilarious sight) to wake it up. Who knew? Will try that on my next date when she falls asleep during love-making...lol! Kill-Kill-Kill- Moo-Moo-Moo…
What a messy toddler! We get an arm up a cow’s snatch, exploding heads (at the hands of a gun that violently slams a metal rode through one’s skull), messy cow bites, blood splashes galore and much more! Dig in!
John Lynch (Dan) was exceptional. Grounded, intense and likeable, I so loved this dude! Essie Davis (Orla) did well with her character’s many layers and transition. Marcel Lures (John) was ideal as the slimy doctor. Sean Harris (Jamie) sold me as the badass on the run.
T & A
We get some dude's ass. I’ll stick to the cow’s hamburger-derriere thank you very much!
Dark, well paced, strikingly shot and efficiently edited, I was wooed by this tension-laced opus. I’m keeping tabs on director Billy O'Brien from now on!
We get a gloomy, under the wire yet unnerving score.
“On a farm, no one can hear you scream.” I don’t know what North American Distributors are waiting for to put out ISOLATION. It could be the next THE DESCENT! Although derivative of ALIEN and countless other Sci-Fi/Horror flicks; this Cow Bran played the genre game so damn well, with so much heart and balls, that it felt novel. I guess setting it within a farm, with cows as culprits AND making it work added to that vibe. Gory, edgy and scary as hell, ISOLATION is calling your name and you should answer right now. MOO!!!!!
The film was shot in County Wicklow, Ireland.