Boll gets Furlong

Uwe Boll has signed Edward Furlong to his latest documentation of monkeys flinging shit at each other. Billy Zane and Kristina Loken are also along for the adventure. The film is JANJAWEED and it is about American journalists in Sudan who are torn between coming home and reporting on the atrocities, or staying there to help. I’m sure it will be handled with the requisite sensitivity. Just like the window washer scene in POSTAL.

I literally have no idea how Uwe Boll continues to snare talent. I mean, these people are the industry, they’ve seen his movies, right? It’s not like he’s creeping up on them unawares. They know who this mother f-cker is, don’t they? How is he doing it? And more importantly, who is safe? Are our loved ones? Our children? What kind of black magic is this?