CON: Kevin Smith

There were only three things I wanted desperately to achieve during my first visit to The Con this year - 1) Drink heavily, 2) Find out if The Arrow is as awesome as I imagined, and 3) See Kevin Smith's Q&A on Friday night. The first two were easy. I drank so much this weekend I had to let my eyes bleed out every morning in the shower. As for Arrow, put it this way, other than the Thomas Jane experience and maybe the Jessica Alba sighting and George Romero picture, Arrow was the highlight of my trip. I've never met a guy that can slam back ten drinks, look like he's going to either kill someone or pass out at any second, and then recite the plot, cast, release date, and nude scenes of any horror film in the past thirty years without missing a beat.

Which brings us to the Kevin Smith Q&A. I had already been sitting in Hall H for five hours by the time he took the stage. My ass was killing me, people were starting to smell like food, and the retard dressed like Captain America behind me keeps hitting me in the back of my head with his cardboard shield. None of that mattered now though, Silent Bob just showed up. He starts with love for the Comic Con and how he's been coming here for years. He laughs at how big it's gotten and how he never pictured Steven Spielberg sending a video for the fans from the set of a new INDIANA JONES movie. He pokes fun at Spielberg and the fact that he's just jumping on the bandwagon at this point. I pretty sure the word "whore" was used at some point. Watch the the whole bit here.

Clearing up any questions as to why he's here, Kev announces that he's actually pushing two new projects. The first is a new book titled 'My Boring Ass Life' that compiles all of his blogs from SilentBobSpeaks.com due in September. The second was the pilot for 'Reaper', a new show starting up on The CW this fall, which he directed. After ten minutes of talkie Kev announced we were going to get to see the 'Reaper' pilot in it's entirety and walked off the stage. All I could think was... "What The F*CK?" The program I had said nothing of this 'Reaper' business. Had things changed during my confinement? Was the Sun still out? Bring Kev back out dammit! My time is now limited if I want to make the SUPERBAD screening eight blocks away and I haven't had a drink in eight hours. Still, I sit and watch.

Very similar in tone and plot to 'Dead Like Me', 'Reaper' tells the story of Sam (Bret Harrison) and the dark secret he finds out on his 21st birthday. Seems Sam's parents sold his soul to the Devil before he was born. As Sam tries to let this little tidbit set in, Satan (Ray Wise) himself shows up and tells him about his new job. Sam will hunt down any souls that have escaped and return them to Hell. Sounds easy enough until the first guy he tries to round up starts burning down buildings by shooting fire from every appendage. The pilot turns out to be pretty decent, probably enjoyed more if I wasn't looking at my watch every three minutes.

Kev finally comes back out after the screening and starts introducing cast and crew. Again, "What the F*CK?" Stars, Ray Wise, Missy Peregrym and writers, Tara Butters and Michelle Fazekas take a seat on the stage and Kev immediately turns to questions from the audience. The line is now 150 people deep and they've been standing though most of the previous panel and the entire screening. The first two questions are directed to Kevin, generally trying to get some funny stories and the banter he's famous for. However, while we do get a glorious story about watching his dogs have sex, Kev starts to veer questioning towards 'Reaper'. Thing is, these people have been standing there forever and probably missed the same schedule change I missed. Kev does his best at pushing the show and pleasing the crowd at the same time.

My favourite moment came when a little boy stood up to the mic right after a rather raunchy tale and Kev says, "Look at you, all little and shit and I'm up here talking about cock-sucking." Sadly, I couldn't stay much longer and I know Kev likes to go over his time limit so I had to call it a night. Overall I could have done with less screening and more "dog f*cking" stories but it wasn't to be. Was it as awesome as I thought it would be? No, but at least I wasn't this guy....

Source: JoBlo.com



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