Categories: Horror Movie Reviews

Use Me (Movie Review)

PLOT: An ambitious filmmaker discovers the darkest parts of himself when he turns his camera on a beautiful woman who humiliates men for money.

REVIEW: It's very rare that in this day and age as a news editor here at AITH that a horror movie is offered to me for review that I haven't seen a trailer for – or even heard a thing about. Enter USE ME. As you might imagine, I jumped at the chance to check out the movie based solely on my lack of knowledge of the film. Add to that the fact that I just might be one of the few people out there that still digs found footage movies and USE ME seems like a prime watch on a Thursday morning. Now let's find out if it was what I hoped it would be!

Let me start this off by putting it out there that, if nothing else, the movie sure as hell supplies more than its fair share of – for lack of a better term – hotness. While full-on nudity is a bit sparse, it makes up for it by giving us every kind of tease you could imagine. In fact, just the opening credits are so NSFW that I had to wait until the little woman left the house this morning before I threw this on. You know, just in case she came into my office and thought I was watching – at best – softcore porn. But none of this semi-nudity is particularly sleazy mind you. It's all part of the plot and all serve its purpose. If that helps you out explain it better to your significant other. 

And speaking of the movie's purpose, the film centers on a dude from Australia that is looking to make it big in the documentary game by crafting a hit American movie. He decides to make a film with mind-bending, genre-busting insight into an online humiliatrix named Ceara Lynch. Lynch is a beautiful and demure brunette in her 20s, whose website touts her as a ‘mental humiliatrix’, inviting users to indulge their ‘inexplicable urge to have a pretty girl ruin your life.’ Huh. I didn't know that was a thing. I thought you had to get married to have a pretty girl ruin your life. I'm here all week, folks.

Back to the review, this mental humiliatrix has her rules. She doesn't get naked on camera, she doesn't have sex on camera and she doesn't meet people in real life. Her game is being unattainable. And she's good at her job it seems as she sells things such as her panties, fingernail clippings, hair – and even her sh*t – for buckets of cold hard cash. Not kidding. But this isn't just any cam girl. She's not in it for the money. She has a degree in psychology and says she's really doing all this in the name of furthering her knowledge of the male psyche. Yeah, I'm sure that's what they all say. 

As with all found footage, the only way to get us to buy into the whole shebang is by having top-notch actors bringing us into the world. And I have to say that the actors on board here are stellar. I never felt that I was watching anything other than a documentary – other than the obvious casting flaw laid out below. And while we're talking about the acting, not only is Ceara Lynch a killer actress, but she is brave as hell putting her body on display all over the place in this film. NOTE: I did some research on the flick AFTER penning the first draft of this review and found out that Lynch actually does this for a living. It all makes a bit more sense now. If you're, you know, not at work at the moment, you can check out her NSFW site HERE.

Now as wild and mysterious as our lead girl is, our hero played by director Julian Shaw is a bit on the twisted side as well. In fact, he has literally filmed almost his entire life since he was nine and caught his aunt doing… something to him in the middle of the night. He even goes so far as to make sure his girlfriend records him as she breaks up with him. Needless to say that once these two cross paths and get too deep into each other's lives, there are going to be some fireworks. Sexy as f*ck fireworks. But fireworks that will ruin your life all the same. Worth it? Check out the full flick to find out. 

While I'm not going to go into the "thriller" elements of the story here, I will say that the movie kind of lost me a bit once the "plot" kicked in. This is because anyone who's seen, let's say, JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK will recognize a certain actor as, you know, an actor, and it may lose your suspension of disbelief like it lost mine. But that said, in the end, the movie – while NOT a straight horror film by ANY means – is a fun found footage flick that keeps, as that guy from THE SOCIAL NETWORK would say, bringing sexy back. Urgh. I'm sorry. It's been a long night. 

USE ME hits VOD, Digital and Blu-ray on November 26th.

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Published by
Mike Sprague