Had almost forgotten about this one; glad to see there's still life in the little bugger.
Back in April we brought you the news that Robert Zemeckis and Sony Animation were teaming up to bring the book HOW TO SURVIVE A GARDEN GNOME ATTACK to the big screen. Not much else has broken on that front since, but today that changes with the hiring of on-the-rise scribes Chad Damiani and JP Lavin, who will adapt the book for Zemeckis and Co.
Damiani and Lavin have a variety of random credits to their names: They were both extras in CRANK: HIGH VOLTAGE, for example; they also penned the very short-lived Fox television sitcom "Anchorwoman" . However, their stock has risen recently with an assortment of high-profile writing gigs, among them MAX STEEL, a superhero project that Taylor Lautner is attached to. (I know you can't wait for that one…)
The synopsis for HOW TO SURVIVE A GARDEN GNOME ATTACK:
Move over zombies and adolescent vampires. There’s a new threat in town—and it’s only twelve inches tall. How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack is the only comprehensive survival guide that will help you prevent, prepare for, and ward off an imminent home invasion by the common garden gnome. Once thought of as harmless yard decorations, evidence is mounting that these smiling lawn statues are poised and ready to wreck havoc. The danger is real. And it’s here.
Class 1 gnome-slayer and gnome defense expert Chuck Sambuchino has developed a proven system—Assess, Protect, Defend, Apply—for safeguarding property, possessions, and loved ones. Strategies include step-by-step instructions for gnome-proofing the average dwelling, recognizing and interpreting the signs of a gathering hoard, and—in the event that a secured perimeter is breached—confronting and combating the attackers at close range.
According to Deadline, the intention is to make an edgy PG-13 movie, so the gnomes will be scary. Meanwhile, Zemeckis has apparently not yet decided if he's directing the flick or not, but it is still an option.