Jurassic Park is the next 3D conversion film in line

Why go through the hassle of writing a script, hiring actors, a director, a composer, editor, etc., etc., for a fourth film when you can just take the first film from a franchise, convert it to 3D and re-release it in theaters? 

And thus, JURASSIC PARK 3D was born!  Universal is the latest studio to jump on the conversion game, following on the heels of Disney’s success with THE LION KING 3D and the likely clean sweep that TITANIC 3D will make.  If you’re annoyed by this news (like I am), then all I can tell you is that the average moviegoer is to blame.  It’s no secret that we vote with our cash, and THE LION KING 3D’s $94 million take is simply Disney “making it rain.”  The original budget for the film was $45 million.  It’s original domestic take was $312 million, making a total of $422 million (and that’s just domestic box office!).  That’s swimming in profit, folks.

STAR WARS: EPISODE 1 – THE PHANTOM MENACE 3D wasn’t as successful as the others, but still managed to rake $42 million from the masses, providing a half-assed conversion and pod-racing 3D glasses to vacuum suck the money from our wallets.

With all that being said, I’m sure there are some serious number crunchers in Hollywood, having very serious meetings with charts and graphs and shit that point to huge profits with low risk and a guaranteed, built-in audience to pay for it all. 

Only YOU have the power to quash the 3D conversion craze.  However, if you’re happy to see little Tim get electrocuted on a fence, dated CGI, Dennis Nedry get spit on, or Samuel L. Jackson’s bloody arm in three dimensions, then save up your dollars as JURASSIC PARK 3D crashes into theaters…again, on July 19, 2013.