Another uninspired one-sheet for The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

JoBloJoBlo
Last Updated on July 23, 2021

Don’t know how it happened. I switch shifts with Walkuski one time and now I’m somehow the de facto TWILIGHT coverer. Whack!

Be that as it may, it appears yet another uninspired one-sheet for TWILIGHT: ECLIPSE has premiered over at IMAX (via ShockYa). As painful as it may be to some, we’ve got it for your eyes below.

So, what makes the new poster so damn weak? If you have to ask, you probably haven’t scrolled deep enough to see the shite yourself. Nothing new here folks: A pale faced R. Patz with a pinched brow as if being constipated for a month, Kristen Stewart looking in dire need of another bong load, and Taylor Lautner looking like…well… the star of a TOP GUN reboot. Unimpressive across the board!

Making tweens weep on June 30th, TWILIGHT: ECLIPSE finds Bella (Stewart) once again surrounded by danger as Seattle is ravaged by a string of mysterious killings and a malicious vampire continues her quest for revenge. In the midst of it all, she is forced to choose between her love for Edward (Pattinson) and her friendship with Jacob (Lautner) — knowing that her decision has the potential to ignite the struggle between vampire and werewolf. With her graduation quickly approaching, Bella is confronted with the most important decision of her life.

David Slade directs, from a script by Melissa Rosenberg. Ashley Greene, Kellan Lutz, Dakota Fanning, Nikki Reed, Billy Burke, Jackson Rathbone, Peter Facinelli and Christian Serratos (below) also star.

Source: ShockYa

About the Author

Columnist / Reviewer

Favorite Movies: Horror: Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974), Silence of the Lambs, Jaws, Black read more Christmas (1974), Friday the 13th (1980), Return of the Living Dead, Halloween (1978), Last House on the Left (1973), way too many to list (in the horror genre alone, not to mention out of genre film) Non-Horror: Stand By Me, Lonely Are the Brave, Lost in Translation, Rushmore, Blue Velvet, The Elephant Man, Sling Blade, The Usual Suspects, Reservoir Dogs, Caddyshack, Stripes, Ghostbusters, One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, Harold and Maude, The Treasure of Sierra Madre, There Will Be Blood, Boogie Nights, Fargo, No Country for Old Men, The Big Lebowski, and on and on and on and mothafu*kin on

Likes: Film, Books, Words, Writing, Rhyming, Football (49ers, Lions), Basketball, Wiffle ball, read more Womens Gymnastics, Movies, Music, Underground hip-hop, Reggae, 50s and 60s R&B, Cinema, Alcohol (vodka, rum, whiskey will do), Beer, John Madden football, Scrabble, Clue, Crossword Puzzles and Word Searches, Horror flicks, Saved by the Bell, Married With Children, Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Entourage, Tales from the Crypt, Motion Pictures, Michelle Pfeiffer, Paul Newman, Jack Nicholson, Ellen Burstyn, Scorsese, the Brothers Coen, Mexican Food, Italian Food, Cats, The Color Green, The Beach.

The comment section exists to allow readers to discuss the article constructively and respectfully, focused on the topic at hand.

What’s Not Allowed

  • Abusive language, insults, or harassment toward other users or staff.
  • Hate speech of any kind is strictly prohibited.
  • Bickering, bullying, personal attacks, or baiting others to argue
  • Extended off-topic debates, especially those centered on politics or religion rather than the article topic
  • No AI content or SPAM