After three years and spending one hundred and thirty million dollars, someone must be embarassed to show this trailer for Empires of the Deep with Olga Kurylenko

Before Paul left his shift, he handed this article over to me and said, “Should be a good start.”

Paul has a magnificent sense of humor.

Not sure if any of you have heard of a little movie called EMPIRES OF THE DEEP, but I can tell you after checking out this trailer you will never forget. Why would Olga Kurylenko sign on for this? I’ve seen video games with better graphics. How did something like this even get made? Well, Chinese real estate tycoon Jon Jiang wrote a script and co-financed the project, which was much talked about in 2009. Monica Bellucci was going to star with CATWOMAN’s Pitof helming, even Irvin Kershner (EMPIRE STRIKES BACK) was on board to produce. Two out of three ain’t bad, right?

Then as soon as all three were on, they immediately got off. Michael French replaced Pitof and Kurylenko replaced Bellucci. Harrison Liang and Kevin Jiang from E-Imagine Studio came on as producers; they are also responsible for the effects you will be seeing. Apparently one hundred and thirty million dollars was spent on the graphics. Oh, okay…

Maybe you like shit like this. Maybe I’m just being mean spirited. Or perhaps I didn’t get the mandatory dose of LSD that accompanies a screening. Did I mention it’s in 3D? Brace yourselves.