Reviews & Counting
# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
The Invisible(2007)
Written by: The Arrow
Director: David S. Goyer

Justin Chatwin/Nick
Margarita Levieva/Annie
Marcia Gay Harden/Diane
Chris Marquette/Pete
4 10
Emo-light type duder (Chatwin) is murdered (for a flighty and dumb ass reason) and then returns as a ghost to scream a lot but alas most can’t hear him (lucky them). So he verbalizes non stop and wanders about. Oh and he falls in love too! Once he figures out that in reality, the cruel girl with the skull-cap, has long, Pantene approved curly hair that is. WTF did I just watch?
I’m sure that the book by Swedish writer Mats Wahl and the Swedish film adaptation (Osynlige, Den) do a much better job at driving this story home than this US remake. Actually, as per the laws of physics, it’s freaking impossible that they are worse at it! Although the trailers for THE INVISIBLE have us believe that this baby is about some dead dude trying to solve his own murder a la GHOST; that wasn’t the case. If only we could’ve been so lucky.

The Invisible tried to do 3 things at the same time and failed miserably at all of them. First it aimed to be a “beat the clock” type of story; where Casper the Teen Angst Ghost has to have the living do something before its GAME OVER. Problem was, as per the film’s rules, the protagonist could not be heard of affect anything as a specter. So all he could do was yell a lot, hope that the “plot conveniences cop” solves the case and not learn from his mistakes (your actions as a spirit won’t do shit, they’re not real, stop trying already). Yup, suspense was nil! Now the film did put out one exception in that respect where “one” person was able to hear the lad. That “twist” eventually segued into some oddball, shallow and totally un-credible love story. It went a bit like this; he wrote a poem, I LOVE HIM! She has hair…I LOVE HER! I was supposed to buy into that shite? What am I? A freaking idiot (don't answer that)? COME ON!

Which leads me to the plastic heart of the film: two teen-tarts are invisible in everyday life due to the baggage tagged to their existences thus when the kill/ghost thing happens, it acts as a metaphor with the actual ……ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz. In all seriousness, if handled with a hint of maturity and plausibility, it could’ve been a groovy parallel, but as-is, it was so trite, un-focused and infantile that even my SnakeEyes GI-Joe doll wouldn’t have gotten reeled into it. Add to all that sour syrup; grating side characters (that mom…kill me now man), suspension of disbelief galore in respect to the chain of events/conflicts (the worst cops ever in this film), weird logic (murder don’t mean much here) and lousy casting (if sexy Margarita Levieva is a tough street kid, I’m the Queen of England) and you get a miss-fire all the way through.

With that venom-spat your way, I will give the film this; I often found it visually engaging. Director David Goyer pulled off some sweet shots, the bleak atmosphere was on the ball and I dug the even flow of the whole. The acting on display was also pretty damn good, it eased the pain of the narrative many o times, if only that talent was displayed in a better film. Finally, I like emo rock and this flick was filled to the brim with them type of ditties. The soundtrack alone often prevented me from escaping that theatre to yell “STINKER” at the top of my lungs. All in all, The Invisible meant well... it tried real hard…and it fell flat on its face every damn step of the way. Hey, at least it tried…
Gun shot wounds, blood here and there and bruises. Basically, nothing.
Justin Chatwin (Nick) had the right look and the range for the role, too bad that the flick didn’t give him much room to display the latter. Margarita Levieva (Annie) looked great (think Jessica Alba) and put out an intense performance. She’s got talent and will go places, but in my useless opinion, she was WAYYY too pretty for this part. I didn't buy it! Was Marcia Gay Harden (Diane) raised on the Vancouver stage? Sure felt like it… BC Theatre all the way! Chris Marquette (Pete) played the pussy-ish and shady friend well. Alex O'Loughlin (Marcus) wound up being my favorite actor and character of the lot. He was natural, charismatic and even layered within his “token bad guy” part. Who knew?
T & A
I took a shower when I got home to wash the filth that this flick left me with. Does that count?
Goyer did a fine job on capitalizing on his striking locations, imbuing the film with the right amount of dread while serving up a slick and smooth whole. Too bad the script (or the result of shitty editing) pissed on all of that.
We get a slew of tight emo rock songs that kept me in the loop even though the loop was over before it began.
I brought a date to THE INVISIBLE, so that was 20 bucks (Canadian) for two tickets off the bat. Than I shoved a Diet Coke and a tub of PopCorn down the chick's throat, so that was another 12 bucks right there. We sat through the movie and she felt the same way as I did; it looked polished, sounded great and was well acted. But sadly, all that was within a dim-witted, shoddyly structured, inept and superficial mess that pretended to be “deep”. Then I got home and she blew me silly. Result; the most grueling and expensive “free” head job I’ve ever had to shell out for. The End.
Alex O'Loughlin (Marcus) also co prodcued and came up with the idea for the flick FEED.

The film was shot in British Columbia, Canada.

Margarita Levieva (Annie) was part of the Russian rhythmic gymnastics Olympic team at some point.