Masters of the Universe is available to watch at home right now on Prime Video. A lot earlier than it should be after completely tanking in horrifying fashion at the box office. And it is all our fault. Why did I and so many others not make time for Masters of the Universe at the movies? What is it about the movie that completely shocked me and so many others upon finally checking it out? Is this just another half-cocked Marvel replicant made in a bottle for mass consumption or did we miss out on a shockingly unique movie with all the makings of an old school blockbuster? Take a ride with me through my first experience of the film as I explain the many ways I was wrong. Because quite honestly, I expected it to suck.
WHY I DIDN’T SEE IT IN THE FIRST PLACE
Before we get into the first-time watch experience, here’s why I didn’t go see it at the theater like apparently so many of you: I’m tired. I’m tired of big-budget Hollywood spectacle films with lazy scripts and bad CGI that count on fans’ undying love for nostalgia to give their half-ass efforts a pass in the name of “being a true fan”. Oh, God, those words make me cringe alone.
Masters of the Universe has always been a property just begging for someone to step in and give the IP some theatrical justice. While I’m a fan of the cult film weirdness of the first theatrical rendition of the property, we all know that it wasn’t what it could have been. So, when Masters of the Universe was announced for a modern adaptation (which feels like it happened a thousand times), I was reasonably in. I wasn’t a hardcore fan or anything, but I had the toys and watched the cartoons like seemingly every other kid alive in that era. But when the trailer came out, it was very apparent (or so I thought) that this was going to be another Marvel-fied CG festival with a boring script and so many of the pratfalls that curse modern blockbuster filmmaking. Then at the end of the day, when you ask for something better out of the however many hundreds of millions of dollars they spent to make the movie, you’re met with “oh come on, you just don’t like fun!” responses. No, I love fun! What I DON’T like is being spoon-fed forgettable and uninspired gobbledygook and pretending to like it. Then I saw the running time of two hours and twenty minutes, and that pretty much killed it for me. But today I found out I was wrong. So, if this was you and you feel my pain? Let’s get into the movie so I can explain why it will change your mind.
THE OPENING AND THE SPECIAL EFFECTS
From the opening of Masters of the Universe, the score is an absolute face melter. It feels like Season one and two of Cobra Kai is wearing the scorpion jacket from Drive. Secondly, there’s nothing I love more than a main character narration to open a movie. We’re talking Goodfellas, Fight Club, American Psycho, and yeah, Masters of the Universe 2026. The movie is instantly impressive from the jump as Adam explains the inner workings of Eternos, Eternia, and Castle Grayskull. This is not a boring explanation that takes itself super serious and demands you to pretend to be entertained. It’s lively and charismatic and moves with a brisk pace from shot to shot in a way that captivates you while you get the CliffNotes version of the lore.
And from the jump, all of my concerns about this looking like one of those post-Endgame lazier Marvel movies were put to rest. Let me assure you this cinematography is not the James Gunn fisheye lens where every shot in the daylight looks like it was filmed with a potato. It’s not even that ugly washed-out grey CGI that we’ve come to expect in so many of those straight-to-streaming action movies. These shots and landscapes are beautiful. I mean, yeah, it’s CGI. But it’s bright. It’s fun. It feels kind of like how I would imagine a live-action Into the Spider-Verse movie would feel like. Instead of being disgusted with all the crazy shit taking place on screen, I found myself looking around like a kid in a candy store, not just being okay with how the film looked, but being genuinely impressed by it. This, above all else, is the last thing I expected. Okay, we do need to work on the mouth movements of that CGI baby Cringer Cub. But he’s still way better looking than Krypto. Alright, that’s the last one, I promise.
THE CAST AND THE STORY
As we learn about Adam’s origin as a young boy in Eternia, we meet Duncan, or “Man-At-Arms”. I’m of the opinion that Idris Elba could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves. He can play any role at any time as far as I’m concerned. So I had no qualms about his casting at any point and he does not disappoint. What did surprise me, however, is how well the character is written. He has a full arc in Masters of the Universe and is easily the motivational heartbeat of the entire film. He even looks cooler than expected. Hell, even his famous awkward bowl-cut helmet looks pretty sweet here. When we meet him, he is training a young Adam who is the runt of the group and kind of a wimp. This entire training sequence is fun, though, because it feels like a sort of lighthearted version of the training happening in Sparta in 300.
Regardless of young Adam’s many inadequacies when it comes to toughness and battle… he has a good spirit about it all. He’s no sad sack and he’s actually pretty funny, using humor to cover up his flaws as so many of us do. The film does a great job here of building up his relationship with Teela and Duncan from the ground up. There’s some very simple but also very good writing happening as Duncan explains to Adam that getting knocked down is simply an opportunity to get back on your feet after his dad, King Randor, physically tells him to stop dicking around and toughen up. The movie explains the lore, the challenges, and the emotional heartbeats of the film within minutes, never dragging anything out or feeling the need to make these simple but powerful storylines any more overdramatic than they have to be.
Suddenly, Eternia is attacked out of nowhere in a scene that feels a little like the opening of Man of Steel and a lot like the final battle in Sam Raimi’s Army of Darkness. All Hell has broken loose and there are vibrant characters running around and doing battle all over the place. And once again, it all looks great! The camera work is tight and the VFX shots look finished. Which, let’s be honest, that isn’t always the case these days. The lighting is so crisp I can hardly believe my eyes. Am I enjoying CGI? What is wrong with me? Suddenly we see all the fun characters of Masters of the Universe in action fighting off the forces of Skeletor’s army. There’s Ram Man, Mekaneck, Fisto, and all sorts of zany-looking characters doing battle all around us, and the action is great. Bodies explode off the screen in a cartoon manner and people sword fight at the top of castles. THIS is dumb fun. But not lazy dumb, and there’s a very big difference. Everything in Masters of the Universe feels dumb on purpose and to elicit a very childlike feeling for fans of this IP both new and old.
Back to Man-At-Arms’ arc, his optimism here is contagious. He’s basically Domino at this point, running from room to room and promising everything is going to be okay as he dodges a thousand attempts on his life with a smile on his face. He’s taking on copious amounts of bad guys without seemingly ever being hit. Until he runs into Trap Jaw. And man, I love the way Trap Jaw looks. I can’t get enough of his green face. It’s a real shame this thing tanked for many reasons, but one of them is that it could have done some major toy numbers with how cool all these characters look. Which makes sense, of course, considering this franchise was a toy line first that spawned everything else afterward. The fight sequence between Duncan and Trap Jaw is also great. The camera is getting just a touch Jason Bourne-ish here and there, but it all still works because the choreography is so lively and well crafted. But things finally take a turn for the worse for Duncan and Eternia as the battle ends and Skeletor makes his grand appearance. And he is badass.
Forgetting who is voicing him, the all-time villain looks cool as hell, his movements are sassy in a good way, and he’s an evil sumbitch with great dialogue throughout the film. He’s sadistically evil when he needs to be and funny as hell throughout the film. His voice is a little hard to understand sometimes would be my absolute only complaint. But we’re watching on Prime Video at this point, so throwing the captions on for a moment or two is totally worth it for most of his dialogue. I cannot stress to you enough how alive these characters feel. He practically pops off the screen. His hood is made of this insanely texturized material that you just want to reach out and touch. His red eyes have this cool effect on them that almost looks like it’s reflecting off the screen with a constant lens flare. It’s a visual treat at all times, especially when Skeletor is on the screen. I was blown away and I can’t figure out why the trailers were unable to capture this. But here we are.
The women of Eternia are just as impressive. From Deadpool’s Morena Baccarin as the Sorceress, to Adam’s hot mom in Queen Marlena, and best of all Camila Mendes as grown-up Teela. They are each not only badass but stunning. My only qualm in the casting would be Alison Brie as Evil-Lyn. She’s great, but something felt like a miscast here and especially in contrast with Meg Foster’s rendition of the character back in ’87.
As the first act ramps up, we’re sent to the present day with a now grown-up Adam who immediately lost the sword that could get him home in the visually INSANE portal that sent him to Earth. And I mean insane. It’s like being a kid and seeing a laser tag warehouse for the first time. Or the inside of the UFO in Killer Klowns from Outer Space. It’s hard to put a finger on, but some of the special effects in this movie are just fucking awesome to stare at. Adam now works in Human Resources and kind of ekes his way through life, knowing that he’s not fulfilling his true purpose. The concern from the trailers that we’re going to once again spend most of the film’s running time on Earth is another one you can put to bed. We aren’t here for all that long and when we are on Earth, it’s the exact time you fall in love with Adam. That came out weird. What I mean is, Nicholas Galitzine is the perfect choice for this role.
He’s charismatic. He’s funny. He’s relatable. To be honest, he kind of has a frat kid nature about him, but not in the douchey kind of way. In the Comedy Central Workaholics type way. He’ll say “tight” or “dope” in response to things that happen, but you have to take my word for it that it’s in an endearing way. Anyway, he’s honest to a fault and tells everyone around him about his childhood on Eternia and how once he finds his magical sword he’s going home. He’s so earnest about it when he tells people that it’s actually really funny and makes you wonder, “How many people does he tell this story to?”. Once again, it’s a lot like Ash in Army of Darkness where he is so confidently telling people about where he got his metal arm like it’s no big deal. There are also several different Sam Raimi-patented zoom-in shots throughout the film. As a matter of fact, the entire tone here you could argue feels very Sam-Raimi-esque. It’s silly, it’s funny, but it’s also brazen, action-packed, and entertaining.
Adam is doing his best to get through his life and deal with his annoying boss and coworkers while spending his work time desperately searching the internet for the sword. It’s gotten so bad that his annoyingly PC buzzword-fueled boss is telling him he’s going to get fired if he doesn’t stop looking for weapons online while he’s on the clock. When he gets a lead to where the sword could be, we get a hilarious scene of this giant Armie Hammer in The Social Network-sized guy walking around a comic book store asking people if they have his sword. Here’s where we come across another thing that shocked the hell out of me when it comes to Masters of the Universe: the adult comedy.
THE COMEDY
This script walks a masterful tightrope between content that your kid could watch and laugh at without having any idea of the funny adult jokes peppered throughout the script. Whether it’s Skeletor making weird references about He-Man’s sword dangling between his powerful thighs or Adam fighting with a statue at an angle where he looks like he might be having a Pearl and the Scarecrow moment while customers film him with their phones, there are MULTIPLE laugh-out-loud, stomach laughs to be had in Masters of the Universe. I was genuinely surprised with how funny this script could be, whether there are Michael Scott-type innuendos for the older audience that grew up watching this or just straight-up funny jokes for the whole family. I’ve seen some arguments that the constant jokes get old and take you out of the film. That’s very rarely true, but the genuine laughs make up for it and then some. It’s far more clever and witty than, say, your typical modern superhero movie. As a matter of fact, it’s not close.
As a matter of fact, the entire script of Masters of the Universe is amazingly tight. As someone who was annoyed with the thought of a two-hour and twenty-minute movie for this, the running time flies by for the most part. The movie is shockingly self-aware and meta enough to laugh at itself while keeping the emotional threads intact. The character arcs never feel forced, and the motivational speeches or heart-tugging moments are quick, to the point, and land without ever becoming obvious or melodramatic. The standout of this is once again Man-At-Arms, who has to overcome failing to protect his loved ones and help Adam do the same. There’s a nice thread throughout the movie about what it means to be a man and what it means to fail. But once again, for the cheap seats? It never feels preachy, and it never becomes painfully obvious that the script is attempting to be emotionally manipulative. They get in, get out, and move on in seamless fashion. Somehow nothing feels too heavy for the moment, yet it never feels like you’re watching something completely void of human intelligence, either. It’s a refreshing script that manages to march to the beat of its own drum while simultaneously delivering all the blockbuster goods. There are certain meta moments where the film is in on its own joke, and almost every single one of them works. The script understands the absurdity of all this and accepts its Saturday Morning Cartoon past with arms wide open. At one point Adam asks why Skeletor is doing all this and Teela just says, “because he’s bad”. Adam says, “there’s got to be more to it than that” and she just says, look, “He has a skull for a face”. This movie knows exactly what it’s doing and it’s not trying to trick you into believing anything else.
THE SOUNDTRACK AND THE ACTION
Not only is the score to all this kick-ass, but the soundtrack is full of ’80s and ’90s bangers. Not to worry, these songs don’t feel like they are there to simply mask poorly executed action scenes, and there are no awkward slowed-down covers of famous pop-punk songs. They add to the feeling of the film organically and in a fun way.
When it comes to the action scenes on Earth and when we get back to Eternia for the nonstop action that the rest of the film entails, one thing stands out above all else: The violence. It’s amazing that in a film where we see our hero go through beatdown after beatdown and survive the craziest, dumbest shit imaginable, you still manage to feel the hits. Every punch thrown seems to land with a heaviness we’re just not used to seeing in fantasy action. When Adam gets thrown into a truck by Beast Man, it looks like it really hurts. Even if he does get right back up and dust it off. That added an insanely fun aspect of immersion into every action sequence. This movie is sharp in so many ways I never expected it to be.
When we get back to Eternia, the landscapes never stop being amazing to stare at. The insides of Castle Grayskull have so much attention to detail it has me wanting to jump on eBay and find the Castle Grayskull playset from my youth. The transformation scene comes early enough in the movie that you feel like you get your full-on holy shit package He-Man for just the right amount of time. You come to really appreciate the character as Adam and then get a huge kick out of watching him wield the awesome powers he has as He-Man. The action scenes never really feel redundant and the conversations between He-Man and Skeletor are lively as fuck, with Skeletor constantly surprising you with just how out there he is. This is not a boring cardboard caricature of the classic villain; it’s a lively, jump-off-the-screen, hang-on-to-every-word-he-says character.
Story-wise, Masters of the Universe wraps up in satisfying fashion as well. There are so many places to go with these storylines, and if we do get a sequel, we’ll be able to jump right in with all of our major characters fleshed out and ready to rock. They don’t have enough running time to really get into all the side characters and side villains, but Fisto really stands out as one of the funnier characters on Eternia, and you can just tell he’s going to be a mainstay. There are just too many good fisting jokes to be made. Which again, a few of them made me belly laugh, and that’s just rare in general at the movies these days.
FINAL THOUGHTS
So, consider me converted. This film has perfect pacing, lovable characters (especially He-Man, Man-At-Arms, Teela, and of course Skeletor), and near-perfect casting. The script is sharp, the jokes land at a surprisingly high rate, and the special effects actually feel special. Like, I can actually SEE where the money went in this movie. But the best thing I can say about Masters of the Universe is that it feels like an old-school action blockbuster that would have come out in the ’80s or ’90s.
Maybe, just maybe, enough people like us will give this film a chance since it’s free to watch for anyone with a Prime membership right now, and the viewership will be so staggering we can see how some of those whopping THREE post-credits sequences pan out. Which is another reason I thought this was just going to be a bad Marvel rip-off. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s shockingly unique in a way the trailers were never able to convey what it would be. It’s the kind of movie you can watch with anyone. Or anytime. Throw it on while you clean the house, throw it on having a few drinks with friends, or maybe when you’ve had a heavy day and just want something bright and fun that doesn’t feel like it was made in a content lab somewhere but rather has a beating heart of its own. But whatever you do… give Masters of the Universe a chance! I’m glad that I did.
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