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Something is happening. I'm not the Jedi I should be. – Anakin Skywalker
I recently saw EP3 at the 2005 Cannes Film Festival and what a rush it was! George Lucas really got his shite together for this one! Who knew that “Greedo” (Keep suing them fans for being fans man…sheesh!) still had a soul left to bear! This is the best of the STAR WARS prequels, bar none and I’ll even go as far as saying that I boogied to this entry more than
Return of The Jedi, a film that I cherish as much as a chick’s choppers around my “baguette” on a “Flap-Jacks” Sunday morning.
EPISODE 3 had most of its phasers set to “armor piercing”! Action wise, it started off with one hell of a space dogfight and then kept putting out via light-saber swashbuckling galore! There was more saber bashs in this one than in both Clones and Menace combined. NICE! Brains and heart were also displayed heavily in this bitter-sweet epic! This tale was basically about a blanket of evil spreading about by using a young man’s heart, to eventually choke the whole universe. The meticulously measured manner in which that poignant theme was communicated made for a mucho involving sit down for this jerk. I was on the edge of my Millennium Falcon, wearing my thumper on my sleeve! THANK YOU! Lucas has either honed his screenwriting skills since the last two entries or had a script Doctor come in under the wire, to “medic” things up (I heard that’s what happened with the dialogue).
Now, amidst the fanboy pleasing winks/tie-ins to the already existing sequels (You see that “Speeder-Bike”?), the presence of familiar/beloved characters (Good to see ya Chewie but where the hell was Han?) and the slick new baddies at play (General Grievous owned!), EP 3 was first and foremost a tragedy. It needed to be dark and thankfully, it was, with the sole comic relief at play being R2-D2 doing his R2-D-cute-ass-kicking-thing, more so than ever before (he rocked!). But even with that in tow, the movie never let up it its dreadfulness. The many mammoth battle, the mano et mano combats (loved the Yoda/Emperor one) and yes even R2’s antics were all jacked up in importance due to the “high stakes” of the storyline. I actually felt moistness in my eyes during a couple of bits! I didn’t expect that! It should be said that my pre-existing knowledge of what was to happen (Lets face it any SW fan knows.) actually played in the ride’s favor. The outcome was inevitable from the start and a part of me didn’t want to see it. I cared deeply about the characters and their relationships…they had to make it! Yet at the same time…. I SO YEARNED FOR IT TO GO DOWN! Make sense? Either way, that odd vibe cannoned my emotional investment within the story to a higher galactic plane, resulting in me being clenched in and moved by the film.
On the dark side of The Force, I felt that Anakin's crucial "key turn" moment wasn't fully credible. Furthermore, they held back an inch too much in terms of showing him go “ Dark Side” (in plain English, I wanted to see HIM kill more Jedis). Then there was the “love story” which once more felt too “Harlequin romance novel” cheesy for me to fully swallow. The dialogue was fluffy and both Christensen and Portman shared little to no chemistry. I again “made” myself "believe it" in the name of wanting to be affected. And was it me or was R2 D2 a little to advanced in ass whooping when taking into account that this was a prequel? I guess he got rusty after this Episode. Lastly, there was one Darth Vader moment that made me chuckle out loud (“Noooooo!”). Too bad it was during a “should’ve been” poignant bit. Come on Lucas, could’ve played that important instant in a less clichéd and obvious manner. Its called subtlety baby…SUBTLETY!
When all was said and Death Starred, EPISODE 3 wound up being a well constructed, rip roaring, eye popping and heartbreaking Space Tragedy that should please Star Wars fans of the world. This is the one you’ve been waiting for guys and dolls! Light that saber and fight your last duel with STAR WARS EPISODE 3!