Reviews & Counting
# A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Written by: The Arrow
Director: Rodrigo Cortés

Ryan Reynolds/Paul
José Luis García Pérez/Jabir
Robert Paterson/Dan
Stephen Tobolowsky/Alan
8 10
A truck driver in Iraq (Reynolds), wakes up in a pine box, buried underground with a cell phone, a pen and a Zippo lighter at his disposal (No Hustler mag? His captors are cruel beings indeed...). Dude tries to figure why he's there and how he can get the f*ck out!
A couple of years ago, I thought it would be cool to ride in the trunk of my homies' Vette. Why? I was drunk and stupid that's why. So I got in the trunk, he slammed the door and blasted out of there, to finally hit the highway and give me the fright of my life. I'm not claustrophobic...but I so wanted out! So what kept me sane while I was trapped in there going 100 miles an hour? I focused on poon of the past...what else! Things I'd love to say to some of the girls I had nailed that I never got a chance to. So in keeping with the spirit of that fine moment; I will share some of them thoughts throughout this so called review. All names are real, all comments are real. I know some of these chicks read my crap...so...enjoy! Lets do this!

BURIED has been ducking me like a one night stand not wanting another helping of beef-jerky; I missed the first press screening here in Montreal and missed its screening at Fantastic Fest cause it played at the same time as another film I had to tap. Luckily for me a left field showing went down this morning and I rushed there with a mammoth headache ...and then BURIED finished the job by mashing my brain into puree.... in a good way!

To Josianne: When a guy is going down on you and you have to piss; interrupt him and go to the bathroom as opposed to oopsies here's some pi-pi in your mouth. I'll take insult over urine in my yapper any day.

When I first heard of the BURIED premise; I was like "no way", impossible that they pull off an hour and a half flick with just one hombre trapped in a box underground. I was certain that cut-aways (to maybe his family, the villains, Burt Reynold's stache... what not) would be in effect; but much like everything else in my life, I was dead wrong in my assumption. BURIED put me in a wooden coffin with Ryan Reynolds and then boldly kept me there the whole way. And it managed to remain engaging throughout at that! How? By playing it smart that's how. I always say that a good film starts with a solid screenplay and Chris Sparling's baby was aces. The chain of events were driven by common sense, our lead did all the right moves while the mystery in terms of the WHY was gradually revealed via the tools our hero had at his disposal. The whole thing just felt organic, nothing was forced out, hence upping this beautiful bastard's impact.

To Gemma: You were HANDS DOWN the best f*ck I've had in the last five years. Props! Too bad you were so much into yourself, so conceited that it eventually made you ugly.

Rodrigo Cortés keen eye behind the camera served the film as well. We were treated to lots of intimate close-ups, camera moves that put US there with Reynolds characters and random artsy shots (loved them slow pull outs) that hit home. Furthermore, Cortés maximized the film's situation brilliantly, managing to evoke suspense, claustrophobia and stress out of me. I was being put through the ringer..much like Reynolds character, I wanted OUT OF THAT COFFIN! A tough way to start the day, specially when you haven"t had your morning coffee. And was I alone in relating with the character's utter frustration when he was subjected to the typical pass the buck bullshit on the phone as he was trying to find help? I mean I get pissed off when I deal with moron Internet companies, or cell phone companies who give me the run around when something goes wrong; I could just imagine how this dude felt while getting the same treatment when his life was ON THE LINE! That aspect resonated with me big time... talk amongst yourselves. Finally, shit, hats off to Ryan Reynolds for his fearless and emotionally charged performance. The man went through such a roller-coaster ride of feelings, that I was exhausted for him. This must have been a tough shoot for the lad. Damn! He's definitely come a long way from VAN WILDER that's for sure. Who knew growing a beard and getting a six pack (via BLADE 3) would skyrocket him to mega star status? Hollywood such an unpredictable place.

To Lyanna: Of all the girls I have dated, you were the most messed up. You so scarred me. I couldn't believe it when I walked in and caught you making holes in still wrapped rubbers with a needle. F*ck you, you twisted slut. F*CK YOU!

Any complaints? A couple but not many. Although the score in the picture (by Víctor Reyes) was stellar, I often found myself wishing there was no soundtrack. Hearing music kept reminding me I was watching a movie and clashed with the cinema verite style of the affair. I also predicated the ending before it unraveled; not a biggie as my ass was owned anyways, but it needed to be said. Lastly, every time I heard Robert Paterson's voice (as Dan Brenner); I kept picturing ex American Idol judge Simon Cowell for some reason hence bringing a couple of smiles to my face. Hey they sounded the same to me! All in all though, BURIED was a poignant, unnerving and uber gripping flick with a solid showcase by Reynolds. Its not a film I'd watch everyday; once was enough, but it is one that I will remember. You gonna hop in a hole with this bitch or what?

To Stephanie: I'll always remember your heart shaped ass and pounding it in the shower. I'll also always recollect your whipped boyfriend ringing my doorbell while I was nailing ya... quite the turn on.
We get 2 light gore bits that I won't give away; would ruin the film for yall.
T & A
None of that shit here; its Reynolds in a box!
BURIED made for quite the cinematic left hook! Sporting a tight and intelligent screenplay, Ryan Reynolds going all out, razor visuals, lots of moving moments and tension galore; this mofo hit the spot! Granted, I sometimes wished the score wasn't there and I saw the finale coming a mile away but at the end of it all... I was a fulfilled film-goer...I was also pooped! Get buried with Buried!
Produced by Barcelona-based Versus Entertainment in association with Stateside shingles Safran and Dark Trick Films.

The movie had won the European Fantastic Film Festival of Strasbourg in September 2010.