HORROR TEN SPOT: Top 10 Badass Genre Heroes

Last Updated on August 3, 2021

Ahh JONAH HEX, are you going to be another disappointing PG-13 crapfest that gives us even more reasons to make fun of Megan Fox, or are you gonna smack us all across the face and announce Josh Brolin as a legit genre badass?
I’m actually betting on a mix of both, but either way it seems like a good time to look back on some of the other butt kicking, evil doer slaying, take no prisoners muthaf*ckers who have smashed our skulls in genre pics over the years.
Now this sort of list is guaranteed to ruffle some feathers since everybody’s got their favorites, and not everybody can be at the top of the list. So lock and load, then spit those bullets on your opinions here. I know you got ’em! And if you’re fav is missing, then make your case below.

1. ASH, Army Of Darkness

We finally get to see Ash come into his own with the immortal line, “Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This… is my boomstick!” The transformation from geeky victim to Evil Dead wrangler, fighter, and ladies man is complete. Much like the movie, Ash is more accessible than in the previous entries, and while the horror isn’t as strictly present, this is probably the most fun you’ll have with any of them. Ash might work at S-Mart by the end of it all, but he’s still pure bad ass.

2. MAD MAX, The Road Warrior

By far the best post-apocalyptic action movie of all time, and it’s anchored by one unstoppably cool, leather clad ass kicker. MAD MAX may have introduced the character, but this is the film that made him. He protects those who deserve it, kills those who push him, and makes sure to feed his dog even when he’s likely starving. Classic lone gunslinger concept but made super awesome by the sparse Aussie landscape and Mel’s dogged furiosity.

3. CONNOR MACLEOD, Highlander

Think you’ve got game? Ever tried the stab yourself in the belly to get her to sleep with you trick. Yeah, I didn’t think so. Being immortal has its benefits. It also means that you have a whole lot of time to work on being one of the 10 or so most vicious warriors on the planet. Not bad for a Scottish farmboy.

4. SNAKE PLISSKEN, Escape From New York

It’s hard to explain just how amazing this display and all it’s Clint Eastwood inspired gravitas worked. When Kurt Russell decided to play Snake, he was basically the Zac Effron of his day. A clean cut and happy faced Disney staple who was many things, but badass was not one of them. Then came Snake Plissken and Kurt Russell became Kurt Russell. An unbelievable transformation and a classic anti-hero all in one scruffy, gun-toting package.

5. FRANKENSTEIN, Death Race 2000

I tried to avoid sports based badasses on this list (thus no ROLLERBALL or THE BLOOD OF HEROES), but couldn’t in good conscience leave Frankenstein off. Watching David Carradine in this role kill, maim and f*ck his way through the most twisted car race ever devised is way too awesome to do anything but bow down in thanks. All it took was his choice to off-road and take out doctors and nurses instead of terminal patients left in the road way for him to make me join team Frank for life.

6. JOHN CONSTANTINE, Constantine

When the devil saves you from cancer so that he can get a second chance at your soul, you gotta figure there’s some weight behind the beatdowns you’re giving to the bad guys. But if pure evil fighting prowess doesn’t do it for you, how ’bout a hand for a dude who is willing to literally enter Hell just to help a woman he barely knows find her sister. And he’s got nifty forearm tattoos as well.

7. KYLE REESE, The Terminator

You’ve been sent back in time to save the woman whose child is the only chance of salvation for humanity when she’s threatened by a nearly unstoppable killing machine. So what do you do? You save her ass, and then you tap that ass because no threat of death is so serious to you that you can’t make some time to “make some time” if ya know what I mean. And thank goodness because your man juice is so damn potent that you knock her up in one try with the previously mentioned savior of mankind. No matter how dark the future may seem, the machines have no chance against that kind of old fashioned human badassness.

8. DUTCH, Predator

Thought about going with THE RUNNING MAN here, but that movie is too damn goofy for me to take seriously. And Dutch is the man. Although it’s hard to tell for sure since he spends most of the movie getting his ass handed to him. But then he flexes the biggest muscle of all (his brain, pervs) and takes it to one of the biggest, meanest, intergalactic hunters we’ve ever seen.

9. SGT. BRODSKI, Jason X

Dude’s not only knocking off quips while getting stabbed by Jason, but he also survives the experience and comes back for more. Y’know why, because he’s part Candyman, part JCVD, that’s why. If Chuck Norris was black, he’d be Brodski.

10. RAY CAMERON, Night of the Creeps

Just about the entire Tom Atkins catalog could make it on this list, but when whittling it down to one it mostly comes down to preference. And NOTC’s is one helluva fun movie. Of course Atkins could be in a Nicolas Sparks adaptation and still be one heavy sumbitch. In fact, if the TWILIGHT people have any sense they’ll cast him as the fetus in BREAKING DAWN.