CAN: Looking for JCVD!

LOOKING FOR JCVD… – by John
Fallon

For anybody that knows me well personally or through the
site, its no secret that I am a huge Jean Claude Van Damme fan. I grew up
on his films and unlike Steven Seagal (yes, I still worship his
early stuff – but he lost me when he got fat and stopped doing his own fights)
I never quit on Van Damme, I kept watching his films, even after they started
going straight to DVD in North America.

Sometimes he still hits the bull’s-eye within that field
(In Hell – Wake of Death), some times they’re okay (The Shepard – Till Death)
and sometimes they suck nuts (The Hard Corps – Second in Command) but I still and will always
love the dude. 

Damn, I still remember when WAKE OF DEATH was gonna be shot in
Montreal. I auditioned for a goon role, got a call back, got the role, got
pumped cause I was gonna fight Van Damme and then… the production moved out of
Montreal to shoot in another country, hence it didn’t happen. Was it something I
said…lol! That was my first brush with near Van Damme-ness.

Now Van Damme is in CANNES right now pushing JCVD (my
review of the flick is coming up soon) and when I met a bud for drinks and he
told me that his sister was interviewing Van Damme; I
begged for him to get me in there. All I wanted was to shake the man’s
hand, thank him for the inspiration he’s given me and I wanted a picture with
him. Not too much to ask I thought.

I was supposed to be in that pic…grrrrr!

So my bud said okay, I gave him my cell phone number and he
said he’d call me at 2PM to tell me where to meet him, but the call never
came. I found that odd, then thought my phone had gone caput on me. But winds up that my cell
phone company cut my line off cause I was over my long distance quota (didn’t
know I had one – was never told I had one). They just cut it off, like that, no
warning nothing. WTF!

So I missed Van Damme cause

ROGERS

are a-holes (BTW when I called ROGERS to have my phone reconnected – I told
them – YOU MADE ME MISS VAN DAMME – lol). To be honest, I actually took it
pretty bad. I mean of all the times that this could’ve happened, it had to
HAPPEN at Van Damme time. Man I was bummed! Like REALLY bummed!

The day
after, my bud Deke flew in to back me up as to covering the Festival and we
managed to get invites to a party Van Damme was throwing. So I had another shot!
The moment we walked in the party; I looked around and right away I spotted Van
Damme. 

But he was busy doing shit, telling his staff what to do and how to
streamline the party. He even bumped into Deko while in a hurry. It was looking
good! But it was not a good time to ask for a pic.

So Deko and I hit the bar, cruised the ladies (damn they
were fine – DAMN!), had some gay dude that wouldn’t quit hitting on us all up in there (it almost
got ugly – step off man – we’re straight, don’t let the shaved head and
muscles fool ya) and when we went to go look for Van Damme again, he was MIA
(probably in the VIP room getting well deserved head).

So we then went to Mike Tyson’s party (yup saw the dude –
nope no picture) and finished the night there.
So today, I went to see JCVD, Van Damme’s playing Van Damme flick. I sat
down, watched the film and enjoyed it. On my way out, who do I see getting up
from his seat, surrounded by “buyers” who are applauding him for the film? F*cking
Van Damme again!

It was great to see the dude once more, but nope, it was
not really a good time to ask for a pic. So I booked out while the Muscles from

Brussels

continued glad handing. So here’s where I’m at, I’m gonna try and get a 1
on 1 with the man while hoping to bump into the dude again under more
“fanboy” friendly circumstances.

With that said, I can’t help but feel bitter about this one
thing: if my cell phone provider (yes

Rogers

– f*ck you BTW!) hadn’t cut my line 1 hour before I was to meet Van Damme,
this article wouldn’t exist. I would’ve met him and gotten a picture with
him and all would be well in Graceland. But its not over till its over! To be continued!

GREAT VAN DAMME SCENE!