Necessary Evil: Thanksgiving Horror!

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Gobble Gobble, my holiday horror heads! Hope you enjoyed stuffing your faces yesterday and also ate up our last Teacher's Convention Necessary Evil! Today, as you probably already know, we are celebrating the magic of Turkey Day with our own version of a Thanksgiving slasher! Yes, we are fully aware of Eli Roth's Thanksgiving fake trailer that some thought would be made into a feature film, but never was. We still feel that a Thanksgiving-centric slasher movie needs to be made! Hence, we carved up the following which is partly inspired by Mr. Roth's trailer (but not the same thing).

IDEA: A horror slasher movie that takes place during Thanksgiving called Turkey Day!

OUTLINE: The film opens as a happy family is gathering at a beautiful home in the town of Fort Wayne for Thanksgiving. Five year-old Franky loves watching the joyous arrivals as well as the fun pageantry of the entire holiday. Dressed in a brown sweater with a smiling turkey on it, he asks his mother if he can help set the table. She says no. He asks his dad if he can chop some wood for the fireplace, but is denied. He asks his grandma if he can help cook the turkey. She says he's too young. Determined to add his own touch to the holiday, Franky sneaks back into the kitchen and sprinkles what he thinks is "turkey seasoning" on the bird. A half hour later, the whole family sits down for Thanksgiving dinner. The turkey is carved and consumed. Franky anxiously waits to see how much everyone enjoys his special flavorful touch. Then, grandma begins foaming at the mouth and passes out in her plate. The rest of the family is soon doing the same. Franky is shocked. He runs into the kitchen and returns with his secret ingredient. "You didn't like my turkey seasoning?!" he cries out holding up a box of rat poison.

Thirty years later, Thanksgiving Eve descends upon the small town of Fort Wayne. At the local high school, two students, Ken and Christine, are broadcasting a podcast about the old legend about a family massacre that occurred on Turkey Day long ago. Ken just heard about the story this year and wonders why he hasn't heard of this legend sooner. The broadcast is heard through the school as well as the rest of the town. Teachers hear it, police officers hear it, store owners hear it, and families hear it. Ken and Christine are publicly berated for discussing such a distasteful topic on the eve of a family holiday. The two become so upset that they decide to spend Thanksgiving with their rich friend, Alan, whose parents jetted off to an island for the holiday.

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Thanksgiving Day has arrived and Ken and Christine are at Alan's mansion along with the rest of their friends. While hanging and drinking in a fully finished basement, the group discusses how Thanksgiving should be about spending time with those you truly care to share time with and not annoying family obligations. Ken says his now-single dad begged him to stay for dinner, but they got into a fight over the podcast. Christine mentions she could send her also single mother over jokingly. Alan mentions that his creepy uncle really wanted to come spend the day with him, but refused to invite him! The group has a good laugh at the lame-seeming adults in their town.

As the town of Fort Wayne begins to dig into Thanksgiving, someone is out and about and celebrating the holiday in a much sicker way! Donning a mask made out of an old brown sweater with a smiling turkey on it, the figure skulks through the town, viewing families sitting down to dinner through their bright windows. Now, the evil fun begins! The figure slips into random homes and offs a family member in a violent, Thanksgiving-themed way: chopped with a cleaver, choked by a turkey baster, and bludgeoned with a ceramic cornucopia!

Back at Alan's mansion, the group of friends decide to retire from the basement to the dining room for some previously ordered Chinese food. Upon entering, they discover a full turkey dinner set up on the dining room table along with the murdered family members taken from the other homes in town. The masked figure appears from the kitchen holding a large knife and a cleaver. The group of friends freak out as they are chased about the mansion. It appears that Franky has returned and is determined to sit down to a family Thanksgiving feast no matter what the cost!

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WHY IT COULD WORK: The horror community is still waiting for its Thanksgiving-themed slasher movie! I don't have a clue why Eli Roth's never came to fruition, but my goodness, SOMEONE has to give us one! Holiday horror works! Thanksgiving deserves its own slasher! Just give it to us already!

CHARACTERS: We need some talented up-and-coming teen actors to play Ken, Christine, Alan and the rest of their friends. Honestly, I don't watch any Disney sitcom type shows, but I'm certain that choosing from that Mickey Mouse-inspired gene pool will suite the characters nicely. For the adults in the town, I say sprinkle it with random horror movie staples like Michael Berryman, Bill Moseley, Tiffany Shepis, Caroline Williams, and Tyler Mane.

CONCLUSION: Holiday Horror is usually a no-brainer! I believe that a slasher movie set on Thanksgiving would leave room for tons of fun! Who wouldn't want to see ungrateful patrons being carved up like turkeys?! I know I sure as hell would! Thanksgiving is such a popular holiday that it practically DESERVES its own true horror offering!

Okay friends, it's time to hear if this Turkey Day horror movie goes down easy or gives indigestion! Is there anything in particular that you would want to see in a Thanksgiving horror? Kindly fire them bullets into the comments section below! And if you have any ideas that you think should be made into horror reality, let me know at [email protected].

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Extra Tidbit: What's the scariest thing that ever happened to you on Thanksgiving?

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