Movie Jail: This week’s defendant is…Adam Sandler!

Last Updated on August 5, 2021

Welcome to Movie Jail, a facility like any other, only its inmates are Hollywood writers, directors, actors and producers. This column will serve as a

is guilty of his or her crime. What crime? The crime of consistently being a shithouse.

The Defendant

Adam Sandler

The Case

The Prosecution: Click, Spanglish, Eight Crazy Nights, Bedtime Stories, The Longest Yard, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, Just

Jack & Jill.*

When is enough, enough? Though Sandler’s movies consistently gross over $50M a picture (exceptions are some of his dramatic turns in Reign

Over Me,

Punch Drunk Love and Spanglish), and close to half grossing over $100M worldwide, the quality of this output is just as consistent….in awfulness. His

highest

critically rated movies on Rotten Tomatoes are Punch Drunk Love, Funny People, Stupidity and The Wedding Singer. While most are officially “rotten” on the

site, the

same holds true for the audience rating. And though the court retains the fact that the movies are financially successful, the court fails to receive any

evidence

that anyone likes these pieces of shitballs…..of shit.

The Defense: Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, The Waterboy, Punch Drunk Love amongst others, comedy CDs “They’re All Gonna Laugh At

“What the Hell Happened to Me” as well as his skits on Saturday Night Live and cameos in a handful of other movies like Dirty Work and Coneheads*

*The court recognizes that all movies are subjective, so relax.

Sandler showed up big in his first couple headlining gigs with Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore, widely considered to be his funniest roles and “classics” for

a

generation. He parlayed that success into other successful comedies including The Waterboy, The Wedding Singer and Big Daddy. Some proved to be more

financially

successful than others, but the fact is that Sandler made the mid and late 90s his bitch, and made Happy Madison Productions a money making factory.

IN CLOSING…

So, what’s to be done with Mr. Sandler? Could his earlier successful movies give a pass to the more recent, water downed version of the man?

Does his box office appeal have any bearing in this case? And the most important question to be asked, once all evidence is taken into consideration, I ask

you The Jury, is Adam Sandler GUILTY or NOT GUILTY? Let’s hear YOUR arguments, either side, by STRIKING BACK BELOW.

“Baby talk baby talk….yell….laugh…..SHUT UP!