Movie Jail: This week’s defendant is…Tyler Perry!

Last Updated on August 5, 2021

Welcome to Movie Jail, a facility like any other, only its inmates are

shithouse.

The

Defendant

Tyler Perry

The

Case

The Prosecution: Everything?*

Ladies and gentleman of the jury, since Movie Jail’s construction, we couldn’t think of a better candidate to run the joint than Mr. Tyler

Perry. His safe, inoffensive brand of humor personified in his sassy “Madea” character, has made him a millionaire many times over ($400M to be exact). But are these

movies any good? Anyone who has seen one Tyler Perry movie has seen them all. For the Madea series of movies, the formula follows the geriatric around as she sasses

everyone left to right and imparts wisdom in her inimitable fashion all while trying not to mug to the camera. In the non-Madea movies, a successful person realizes

that money and/or fame isn’t as important as tight family bonds. Puke in my mouth if you would, please? I’ll even pay you. We don’t doubt the man’s popularity and success, we just

question its quality and originality. It’s about time for Madea to get thrown in a proper facility like Movie Jail, and we’re hoping the court agrees.

The Defense: The Madea series and what not*

Ladies and Gentleman of the jury, what can we say about our client, other than he’s an extremely successful filmmaker and writer who’s carved a nice

little niche in the film world for himself? If a filmmaker can sell to a market that’s loyal to his product, what’s the crime here? It appears that Mr. Perry knows

his audience and what they like, and caters to their needs. Mr. Perry may have only two certified

fresh ratings on Rotten Tomatoes but 90% of his movies have scored fresh on the same site. If this was any other popular director who lacked critical acceptance, but audiences loved, this case wouldn’t even make it to trial. It seems that Mr. Perry is nothing but a victim of backlash based on his popularity in this

case, and we’re looking to the jury for a dismissal on all charges because of it.

IN

CLOSING…

So, what’s to be done with Tyler Perry? Is it about time the court shuts the Movie Jail door on the cross dressing filmmaker and throws away

the key? Does his fan loyalty warrant a stay of incarceration?

And the

most important question to be asked, once all evidence is taken into

consideration, we ask

you The Jury, is Tyler Perry GUILTY or NOT GUILTY?

Let’s

hear YOUR

arguments, either side, by STRIKING BACK BELOW.

*The court recognizes that all movies are subjective, so

relax.

WHAT SAY YOU,

NOT?

LAST WEEK’S

VERDICT

It is the jury’s decision that after reviewing

last week’s evidence, the court finds Channing Tatum
NOT GUILTY of all charges. The jury feels that despite Mr. Tatum having the acting prowess of a decomposing sloth, the man has simply been on too good of a run

over the past couple of years to convict.