A Bearded Lady History

As I’m sure you’re all aware, we’re big fans of Salma Hayek and her considerable, um, talents here at JoBlo.com. So we weren’t even dismayed when we heard that she’d be starring as a bearded lady in CIRQUE DU FREAK: THE VAMPIRE’S ASSISTANT. I see plenty of women walking around New York City with facial hair who aren’t nearly as hot as Salma is, so if you’re gonna sport some whiskers, you might as well look like Salma underneath it all. Salma is Salma, I always say.

But that’s not to say that the facial hair route works on all women. Spurred on by Salma’s recent turn with a beard, I decided to take a look through movie history past and find some other hirsute women for your consideration…

Rebecca Romijn in DIRTY WORK

Rebecca’s a sexy lady but that sandy beard is just the creepiest facial hair this side of Spencer Pratt.

Patricia Arquette in HUMAN NATURE

That’s a full body beard for ya.

Judy Greer in “My Name is Earl”

That’s a thick Galifianakis-style beard. If you’re gonna be a bearded lady you could at least trim things up…

Victoria Sanchez in WOLF GIRL

Hairy boobs = not so cool. They look like coconuts.

Mr. T in FREAKED

Now that’s sexy.

Sarah Silverman at the Emmys

A classic, 80s-era moustache that would make Keith Hernandez proud.

Debra Christofferson in “Carnivale”

Is that Captain Lou Albano wearing women’s makeup?